Thursday, November 6

Love is…

Ah…love. It’s what we all want right? Love. Amour. Liebe. Dragoste. It’s known all around the world. But really…can YOU tell me what love is?

Oh, I’m sure you can list off the FEELINGS of love and when you’re in love. But can you tell me what love is?

Let’s go back to the amazing Mr. Webster…

Love is… (1): strong affection for another arising out of kinship or personal ties (2): attraction based on sexual desire: affection and tenderness felt by lovers (3): affection based on admiration, benevolence, or common interests

Yup…there you go. I’m done now. :-)

There have been hundreds, if not thousands, of songs written about love. There are love poems, love stories, love movies, “Dummy” books on love, guides, workbooks, retreats, ad nauseum. The interesting thing is that no one seems to agree on WHAT love is. Webster just now defines love as affection and attraction. Is that it to love? Is love REALLY just a hormonal response to another person or thing?

In typical Webster fashion, he’s defined the term logically. Unfortunately…Love is anything but logical.

“Hard to get
Impossible to hold
Straight and narrow
Like a burning fuse
In a long cold dawn
By the side of the road
A hopeless case
A perfect thing”
– “Love is” - Allanah Myles

It seems that for the human heart, love is simply a mass of contradictions and confusions. There doesn’t seem to be any sort of logical or even understandable reasons as to why a person feels love for someone and nothing for another. It’s this confusion that makes love such a difficult thing to nail down. Just like nailing jell-o to the wall. :-)

Maybe that’s part of the power of love? Maybe it’s BECAUSE we can’t know exactly what it is that we yearn for it so completely?

“If you could come up with a clinical definition, it wouldn't be love.” – SN

So what’s YOUR experience with understanding love? I know SOME of the ways people describe it…inner happiness, a wanting for another to always be there, a sharing of every part of yourself with another, and even pain, tears, and sadness.

“They say it’s a blessing, they say it’s a gift
They say it’s a miracle
And I believe that it is
It conquers all, but it’s a mystery

Love breaks your heart
Love takes no less than everything
Love makes it hard
And it fades away so easily”
– “Love is” - Vanessa Williams

A mystery, an unknowable, a convolution of conflicting emotions and thoughts…yup, it’s jell-o on the wall. :-)

Love isn’t sterile, or really definable, I think. It’s different for everyone and can be the greatest blessing, and yet, also the greatest weapon. It’s a grand combination of all your thoughts, feelings, beliefs, wants, everything that makes you, you. Love…true, unconditional love, is something that involves an entire person. It can’t be separated into component parts, because love can’t be broken into pieces. You can’t just think love for someone anymore than you can just feel love for another person. Contrary to what the world wants you to believe, true love doesn’t come in shades and degrees. It is whole and complete and simply a beautiful thing to experience.

I pray for all my readers that you find and experience unconditional love in your life. It’s a hard thing to come by, and most of us don’t believe it when it does show up. Keep your eyes open and give love unconditionally when you can.

And remember…I love each and every one of you too.

Wednesday, November 5

Miracles Happen…

It doesn’t matter what you believe in, if it’s God, or Buddha, Allah, or a Divine Power of the Universe. There are some things that can really only be attributed to a Higher Power. Don’t believe me? Let me tell you a story then…

A guy and his wife are getting a divorce. Sometimes it’s nice and sometimes it’s just hell between them. More the latter than the former. The man goes to see a lawyer, knowing that things will go badly for him and his kids if he doesn’t get help. A couple years ago, the man was trying to get some advice and only 1 out of 12 returned his call. So, he goes to the one that he talked to before. He feels good talking to the lawyer, and finds out that she is the BEST in town to help him, but ultimately, it comes down to money. Money that he does not have and really has no way to get.

Having faith, he starts to call his friends and loved ones.

“Can you help me?” he asks them all.
“I’m SO sorry. I would give you anything that I had, but I have nothing to give you. I will try to find something and some way to help.” They all respond.

All but two. And they said, “I have an idea. I will help you find a solution.”

And they went to work on the problem.

The next day, he gets a call. “We have taken care of the money for you. There were no problems. And were happy to be able to do this.”

So, now the fight begins. Without any doubt in his heart, the man makes the arrangements to protect his kids. More and more comes out and when he thinks about it all, it scares him to his core. But he knows that God is on his side, how could he not? There was nothing that he could do on his own, and yet, everything has worked out. So, every day now when he wakes up, he says a prayer of thanks to God and when he sees his friends and loved ones, he thanks them and God that they are in his life.

Every single day, miracles happen in this world. Things that have no logical explanation. Some put these things down to chance, or coincidence, or luck, or fate, or whatever. And if you simply can’t bring yourself to believe that there is something greater than yourself, that just might be looking out for your happiness and willing to help you out, then that’s your choice. And a perfectly valid choice too.

As for me? I don’t think that I’m the greatest power in my life. I believe that God is infinitely more powerful than me, and He wants the absolute best for me in this life, and He will actively work to help that come about.

I love you all…regardless of what you believe in and I pray that everyone that reads my writings gets blessings by the armful!

So, today I will leave you with a prayer. Not mine own, but a prayer from Mother Theresa. May every word of it be true in your life.

May today there be peace within.
May you trust God that you are exactly where you are meant to be.
May you not forget the infinite possibilities that are born of faith.
May you use those gifts that you have received, and pass on the love that has been given to you.
May you be confident knowing you are a child of God. Let this presence settle into your bones, and allow your soul the freedom to sing, dance, praise and love.
It is there for each and every one of us

Tuesday, November 4

Footprints in my Heart…

“One step I make an imprint
Two steps it's a commitment
Three steps I'm not done yet
Draw my other leg up and the pace is set”
– “Imprint” - Double Drive

Friends, acquaintances, random strangers, people are brought into your life all the time. Do you notice them? Or are you like most people, so deep in your own shit and mired in all your problems that you are completely unable to see when someone steps into your life?

Nothing in life is an accident or coincidence. I don’t believe that. Your life has a purpose and everything that is in your life or going on in your life is there FOR A REASON. No matter what it is, or how shitty it may be, everything has a purpose in your life.

Most times we only figure out the reason when it’s gone or we’ve gotten through it. Sometimes, some special times, we are given the reason early and can appreciate the things in our lives in the present. And sometimes, we simply do not know and maybe never will.

So what about the people that you meet and greet every single day? Most would probably fall into the category of acquaintances or coworkers. People that you see and say hi to, maybe even talk to for a while about this and that, but honestly, you don’t REALLY know. They all have a purpose. If you think back on the people that you’ve known, maybe you can see the purpose for some of them. Maybe their purpose was to provide social comfort or simply a laugh. They are all important to your life; otherwise, they wouldn’t be in it.

How about your neighbors? Do you know them? Can you say hi by name to them? Sadly, our world seems to have adopted a policy of personal isolationism. Something that was unheard of only 30 years ago. And yet, those people are there in your life for a reason as well.

And the REALLY important people in your life? Family, close friends? Of course we can see that THEY have a purpose in our lives. We know them and their lives, what they like, what they bitch about, everything. For some, we couldn’t imagine a day without them IN our lives. Even if there are days we DON’T want them in our lives. :-)

Just as everyone in your life has a purpose…so do YOU have a purpose in everyone’s life that you touch. Think about everyone that you have contact with and take a moment to see if you can figure your purpose for them. Then make it a point to BE that purpose for them. And if you can’t see your purpose, then just BE for them. In whatever way you can.

The point of life is not in how much you GET from it, but rather, how much you GIVE to it. The saying is…”Give and ye shall receive.” Also, what comes around goes around. Some call it Karma, some call it God, I call it…love.

People come into your life for a reason, a season or a lifetime.
When you know which one it is, you will know what to do for that person.

When someone is in your life for a REASON, it is usually to meet a need you have expressed. They have come to assist you through a difficulty, to provide you with guidance and support, to aid you physically, emotionally or spiritually. They may seem like a godsend and they are. They are there for the reason you need them to be. Then, without any wrongdoing on your part or at an inconvenient time, this person will say or do something to bring the relationship to an end. Sometimes they die. Sometimes they walk away!! Sometimes they act up and force you to take a stand. What we must realize is that our need has been met, our desire fulfilled, their work is done. The prayer you sent up has been answered and now it is time to move on.

Some people come into your life for a SEASON, because your turn has come to share, grow or learn. They bring you an experience of peace or make you laugh. They may teach you something you have never done. They usually give you an unbelievable amount of joy. Believe it, it is real. But only for a season.

LIFETIME relationships teach you lifetime lessons, things you must build upon in order to have a solid emotional foundation. Your job is to accept the lesson, love the person and put what you have learned to use in all other relationships and areas of your life. It is said that love is blind but friendship is clairvoyant.

Thank you for being a part of my life, whether you were a reason, a season or a lifetime.

Monday, November 3

All F’d up…

“How could I be so happy
And still feel so messed up inside
I've broken all the records
For the unhappiest man alive”
– “Million People” – DoubleDrive

Given that we ALL wear masks to some degree or other, this particular feeling shouldn’t be anything new to you. I see SO many people walking around laughing and smiling and acting like they haven’t a care in the world and life is the best it could absolutely be. I’m not surprised by that really, or the fact, that I would bet you, that at home, or by themselves, their smiles fade and the laughter dies as they struggle to figure out what is going on and how to make it through one more day.

So what do we push onto every one of the unwashed masses suffering this way? Pop another Prozac and take another Xanax and push every feeling you’ve ever had away.

Now…I’m looking and seeing that anti-depressant and sleeping pill prescriptions are off the chart and we’re making the companies millions and millions in the process. So, at least THEY’RE happy!

I’m pretty certain that this isn’t how we’re supposed to be living life. And if this fits you…STOP IT! You can’t be living the life you want or in the ways you want to or are meant to deadening yourself to your life. Now, don’t think I’m saying quit everything. I’m not a doctor, but I KNOW that you can hurt yourself more by stopping cold turkey. But you should try to consider getting out from under the burden and weight of such a false coping mechanism.

Maybe I’m just WAY out there, but I believe that life is meant to be experienced. And unfortunately, we can’t pick and choose the experiences we want to have in life. We have to take the great, wonderful, and awesome with the bad, horrible, and painful. See, life isn’t about NOT feeling things, but rather, understanding HOW to feel things.

Most people feel things in their life. Happiness, sadness, joy, peace, anger, pain, love, etc. But they also don’t know HOW to feel those things.

How do YOU feel your life?

Do you let your feelings and experiences run like a train over you? Oftentimes leaving you broken and trampled in its wake? Guess what…I bet you do.

And that’s NOT how it’s supposed to be. Life isn’t a railroad looking for the next target. It’s a wonderful river that will carry you through to the end, yes, and soak you to the bone and probably make you shiver with cold sometimes, right before floating you through a beautiful sunny patch. It’s the experience that brings you joy and wonder and pure amazement.

So…how do we do it? How do we make it through life and experience everything that life will give us and not become a chunk of road kill along the way?

I believe that it comes down to acceptance and faith. Acceptance to know that, yes, life will hand you shit as well as cake sometimes. That’s just the way life is. It doesn’t mean you’re getting picked on, or singled out. Sometimes, life’s a bitch that way. But you balance that out with faith. Faith in the belief that YOUR life is ultimately supposed to be for YOUR good. Faith that even if and when the bad times come, there is always good waiting for you.

I know it’s not easy; I would NEVER lie to you like that. But I think it’s a way to live unfettered and free from anything that will keep you from the fullest experience you can possibly have.

“Take my hand and walk with me, the best in life is yet to be.” - Anonymous