tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18379351876627860172024-03-13T15:26:11.303-04:00Profound Thoughts For The DayThink! It's not illegal yet!Unknownnoreply@blogger.comBlogger136125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1837935187662786017.post-80318736605184854122013-04-27T16:34:00.000-04:002013-04-27T16:34:38.989-04:00<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
Greetings and salutations to all!<br />
<br />
I wanted to let anyone that still might be interested know that I am going to start posting to PTFTD again. I have, however, moved the site to Wordpress. You can find the new site here:<br />
<br />
<a href="http://www.ptftd.wordpress.com/">PTFTD Blog</a><br />
<br />
Please bear with me as it is a site in flux. I will be testing themes, widgets, and other various settings in order to find the right mix. I don't want to wait to start sharing profound thoughts again, though. :-)<br />
<br />
So...if you still want to follow this blog, feel free to head on over to the new one.<br />
<br />
Keep thinking! it's not illegal yet!<br />
<br />
See ya'll there.<br />
<br />
B~</div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com9tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1837935187662786017.post-24118336787082212222011-07-07T13:11:00.000-04:002011-07-07T13:11:28.972-04:00Stop and smell...life?<div style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-color: white; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial; font: normal normal normal 13px/19px Georgia, 'Times New Roman', 'Bitstream Charter', Times, serif; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0.6em; padding-left: 0.6em; padding-right: 0.6em; padding-top: 0.6em;"><div mce_style="text-align: left;" style="text-align: left;">I want to share with you all an email that I received from a good friend. Then I’m going to rant a little. :-)</div><div mce_style="text-align: left;" style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div>***************************<br />
<br />
<img alt="Joshua Bell" height="240" mce_src="http://lotusroot.files.wordpress.com/2009/08/joshua-bell.jpg" mce_style="vertical-align: middle;" src="http://lotusroot.files.wordpress.com/2009/08/joshua-bell.jpg" style="border-bottom-width: 0px; border-color: initial; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-width: 0px; border-style: initial; border-top-width: 0px; vertical-align: middle;" width="290" /><br />
<div mce_style="text-align: left;" style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" mce_fixed="1" mce_name="strong" mce_style="font-weight: bold;" style="font-weight: bold;"><br />
</span></div><div mce_style="text-align: left;" style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" mce_fixed="1" mce_name="strong" mce_style="font-weight: bold;" style="font-weight: bold;">THE SITUATION</span><br />
In Washington, DC, at a Metro Station, on a cold January morning in 2007, this man with a violin played six Bach pieces for about 45 minutes. During that time, approximately 2,000 people went through the station, most of them on their way to work. After about 3 minutes, a middle-aged man noticed that there was a musician playing. He slowed his pace and stopped for a few seconds, and then he hurried on to meet his schedule.</div><div mce_style="text-align: left;" style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><span class="Apple-style-span" mce_fixed="1" mce_name="strong" mce_style="font-weight: bold;" style="font-weight: bold;">About 4 minutes later: </span><br />
The violinist received his first dollar. A woman threw money in the hat and, without stopping, continued to walk.<br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" mce_fixed="1" mce_name="strong" mce_style="font-weight: bold;" style="font-weight: bold;"><br />
</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" mce_fixed="1" mce_name="strong" mce_style="font-weight: bold;" style="font-weight: bold;">At 6 minutes: </span><br />
A young man leaned against the wall to listen to him, then looked at his watch and started to walk again.<br />
<div mce_style="text-align: left;" style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" mce_fixed="1" mce_name="strong" mce_style="font-weight: bold;" style="font-weight: bold;"><br />
</span></div><div mce_style="text-align: left;" style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" mce_fixed="1" mce_name="strong" mce_style="font-weight: bold;" style="font-weight: bold;">At 10 minutes:</span></div><div mce_style="text-align: left;" style="text-align: left;">A 3-year old boy stopped, but his mother tugged him along hurriedly. The kid stopped to look at the violinist again, but the mother pushed hard and the child continued to walk, turning his head the whole time. This action was repeated by several other children, but every parent - without exception - forced their children to move on quickly.</div><span class="Apple-style-span" mce_fixed="1" mce_name="strong" mce_style="font-weight: bold;" style="font-weight: bold;"><br />
</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" mce_fixed="1" mce_name="strong" mce_style="font-weight: bold;" style="font-weight: bold;">At 45 minutes:</span><br />
The musician played continuously. Only 6 people stopped and listened for a short while. About 20 gave money but continued to walk at their normal pace. The man collected a total of $32.<br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" mce_fixed="1" mce_name="strong" mce_style="font-weight: bold;" style="font-weight: bold;"><br />
</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" mce_fixed="1" mce_name="strong" mce_style="font-weight: bold;" style="font-weight: bold;">After 1 hour:</span><br />
He finished playing and silence took over. No one noticed and no one applauded. There was no recognition at all.<br />
<div mce_style="text-align: left;" style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div mce_style="text-align: left;" style="text-align: left;">No one knew this, but the violinist was <span class="Apple-style-span" mce_fixed="1" mce_name="strong" mce_style="font-weight: bold;" style="font-weight: bold;">Joshua Bell</span>, one of the greatest musicians in the world. He played one of the most intricate pieces ever written, with a violin worth $3.5 million dollars. Two days before, Joshua Bell sold-out a theater in Boston where the seats averaged $100 each to sit and listen to him play the same music.</div><br />
This is a true story. Joshua Bell, playing incognito in the D.C. Metro Station, was organized by the Washington Post as part of a social experiment about perception, taste and people's priorities.<br />
<br />
******************************<br />
<br />
So, here’s the thought…<br />
<span mce_style="font-size: medium;" style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" mce_fixed="1" mce_name="em" mce_style="font-style: italic;" style="font-style: italic;"><span class="Apple-style-span" mce_fixed="1" mce_name="strong" mce_style="font-weight: bold;" style="font-weight: bold;"><br />
</span></span></span><br />
<span mce_style="font-size: medium;" style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" mce_fixed="1" mce_name="em" mce_style="font-style: italic;" style="font-style: italic;"><span class="Apple-style-span" mce_fixed="1" mce_name="strong" mce_style="font-weight: bold;" style="font-weight: bold;">Are you taking time each and every day to enjoy the world around you?</span></span></span><br />
<div mce_style="text-align: left;" style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div mce_style="text-align: left;" style="text-align: left;">I think that most of us get so caught up in the trivial matters of the day that we forget to stop and enjoy the life we have. Sure, we notice the flowers, the sunrise or sunset, the beauty of a clear blue sky, but do we actually take the time to take it all in and let it warm our hearts and spirits?</div><span class="Apple-style-span" mce_fixed="1" mce_name="em" mce_style="font-style: italic;" style="font-style: italic;"><br />
</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" mce_fixed="1" mce_name="em" mce_style="font-style: italic;" style="font-style: italic;">“Time is a companion that goes with us on a journey. It reminds us to cherish each moment, because it will never come again. What we leave behind is not as important as how we have lived.”</span><br />
<br />
I know that everyone feels they are busy to the point of near exhaustion, but life doesn’t wait. You have to reach out and grab it with both hands, and once you’ve got it, never let it go. Life is something that is beautiful and really, just waiting for you to go explore it.<br />
<div mce_style="text-align: left;" style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div mce_style="text-align: left;" style="text-align: left;">I talk with a lot of people and everyone is always saying that they “didn’t have time to do that”. I want to reword that particular statement for everyone, because I’m sure that everyone has used it at some point. </div><div mce_style="text-align: left;" style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div mce_style="text-align: left;" style="text-align: left;">So, here’s my version of it:</div><span class="Apple-style-span" mce_fixed="1" mce_name="em" mce_style="font-style: italic;" style="font-style: italic;"><br />
</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" mce_fixed="1" mce_name="em" mce_style="font-style: italic;" style="font-style: italic;">“I didn’t MAKE time to do that”</span><br />
<br />
See, how you live your life is all about your priorities and where you choose to place your focus. For me, that’s an easy call. My priorities are (in order of importance):<br />
<ol><li>My son, Caleb</li>
<li>My sons, Chase and Gabriel</li>
<li>My faith and my God</li>
<li>My girl</li>
<li>Everything else :-)</li>
</ol><div mce_style="text-align: left;" style="text-align: left;">Too often we get caught in that trap of work. You know the one, where you put in 60-80 hours a week, doing your best, trying to make sure you keep your job, telling yourself that you’re working so hard to provide for your family. Guess what? While you’re killing yourself working, you’re only providing your family with money. You are DEpriving them of what they need most…YOU. Even if you don’t have a family to provide for, you’re still doing yourself an injustice simply because you are missing out on the beauty of life.</div><span class="Apple-style-span" mce_fixed="1" mce_name="em" mce_style="font-style: italic;" style="font-style: italic;"><br />
</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" mce_fixed="1" mce_name="em" mce_style="font-style: italic;" style="font-style: italic;">“Time is what we want most, but... what we use worst.”</span> <span class="Apple-style-span" mce_fixed="1" mce_name="strong" mce_style="font-weight: bold;" style="font-weight: bold;">- William Penn</span><br />
<br />
I had a friend once tell me that she worked 70-80 hours a week because she wanted to be able to enjoy life when she retired. Do me a favor and reread that real quick. :-) Because I asked her a very simple question in response…Why are you going to wait until you retire to enjoy your life?<br />
<br />
So, I’ll ask you again…are you taking the time to enjoy your life? Are you happy with the priorities that you have chosen or do you wish you had more time for something else in your life? You only get one life…this one. It’s up to you to make the most of it.<br />
<br />
So today, I encourage you to take a long look at your life. Stop and enjoy the amazing world around you. And make some time to stop with me and listen to an incredible subway musician and share in the beauty that is always around us, if you know where to look.</div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1837935187662786017.post-67783407500517967052010-04-27T13:26:00.000-04:002010-04-27T13:26:13.761-04:00PTFTD has movedGo check out the new site. <a href="http://ptftd.net/">http://ptftd.net</a>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1837935187662786017.post-39253600436952920422010-03-30T13:56:00.000-04:002010-03-30T13:56:44.559-04:00How to say Goodbye…For all my readers, I’d like to ask a favor. Before I start my thoughts today, I’d like you each to take a moment and offer up a heartfelt prayer to whomever you believe in for a very good friend of mine. Her husband recently passed away. Please also offer up prayers for their kids as well. Go now, take a few moments. Thanks.<br />
<br />
------------<br />
<br />
Thank you all. I appreciate your help in caring for a good friend’s spirit.<br />
<br />
Some people come into our lives and quickly go. Some stay for awhile and leave footprints on our hearts. And we are never, ever the same.<br />
<br />
As most of my long time readers will know, in 2008, my sons’ mother died. As anyone who has lost a relative or someone that they cared about can tell you, it’s not easy. Hell, that’s kind of putting it a bit mildly actually. In fact, it’s damn near the hardest thing you’ll ever have to deal with in life.<br />
<br />
It’s also one of the few things that is really guaranteed from life. Everything dies. Now, that’s simply a cold hard truth and one that a lot of people don’t ever like to think about, especially when it concerns a loved one. But there it is and there’s nothing anyone can do about it.<br />
<br />
So, how do you say goodbye?<br />
<br />
There’s been tons of articles written about this and a boatload of advice. However, having gone through this myself recently, I think I can accurately say, most of all that is complete crap. You find those great clichés of:<br />
<br />
<div style="text-align: left;"> • It’s good that they aren’t hurting anymore<br />
• They wouldn’t want you to be sad or mourn their passing<br />
• Time will heal<br />
• They are in a better place now<br />
• Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah</div><br />
I’m sorry, but WTF??!! I know that everyone that says those things is really reaching just to try to provide comfort. They are trying to help. And in a time like this, no one ever thinks that silence, sitting and giving of your presence and just BEING there is enough. No one seems to remember that there is a mountain of jumbled emotions ranging from peace to anger and covering every other part of the spectrum going on inside.<br />
<br />
See…for those of us that have lost someone, there IS a part of our minds that KNOWS all those little platitudes. It’s a VERY small part of your mind and usually your heart and spirit tend to drown out its voice. Most of us will smile and thank the person speaking, then go back inside and scream and yell and rage.<br />
<br />
Saying goodbye isn’t ever an easy or nice thing. It just isn’t. We all want the time to never end and our human minds tend to push off the fact that someday goodbye will be forever. That fact, of course, underscores how important today is for each of us. Sadly, that’s a fact that most of us don’t realize until after something happens.<br />
<br />
<div style="text-align: center;"><i>Cherish them, remember them, love them for the rest of your time and “Goodbye” will become “Hello again” soon enough. – me :-)</i></div><br />
I tend to joke with my friends and children about my own ending. I always tell them that <b><i>IF </i></b>I have anything to leave to them, it will be dependent on them throwing a party to celebrate my life, not a funeral to mourn my passing. I don’t think they believe that I’m 100% serious. Just me, but it better be a fully stocked open bar or two as well. You all are witnesses now, I expect you to make sure it happens. :-)<br />
<br />
Goodbyes are hard. I cry every time my sons leave to go home. I think that my faith helps the transition as I don’t believe that this is all there is to my life and spirit. But it’s still hard. For me, I try to make certain that I tell those I love and care about that I do. I see it as a matter of leaving no doubt. That no matter what might happen to me; they know and understand for certain how I feel about them and how special they are to me. In some ways, that makes my goodbyes a little easier.<br />
<br />
Ideally, we should never have to say goodbye. And I would encourage that, in your heart, you never do. <br />
<br />
<i><br />
</i><br />
<div style="text-align: center;"><i>Sometimes people come into your life and you know</i><br />
<i>right away that they were meant to be there, to serve</i><br />
<i>some sort of purpose, teach you a lesson, or to help</i><br />
<i>you figure out who you are or who you want to become.</i><br />
<br />
<i>You never know who these people may be - a roommate, a</i><br />
<i>neighbor, a professor, a friend, a lover, or even a</i><br />
<i>complete stranger - but when you lock eyes with them,</i><br />
<i>you know at that very moment they will affect your</i><br />
<i>life in some profound way.</i><br />
<br />
<i>Sometimes things happen to you that may seem horrible,</i><br />
<i>painful, and unfair at first, but in reflection you</i><br />
<i>find that without overcoming those obstacles you would</i><br />
<i>have never realized your potential, strength,</i><br />
<i>willpower, or heart.</i><br />
<br />
<i>Illness, injury, love, lost moments of true greatness,</i><br />
<i>and sheer stupidity all occur to test the limits of</i><br />
<i>your soul. Without these small tests, whatever they</i><br />
<i>may be, life would be like a smoothly paved straight</i><br />
<i>flat road to nowhere. It would be safe and</i><br />
<i>comfortable, but dull and utterly pointless.</i><br />
<br />
<i>The people you meet who affect your life, and the</i><br />
<i>success and downfalls you experience, help to create</i><br />
<i>who you are and who you become. Even the bad</i><br />
<i>experiences can be learned from. In fact, they are</i><br />
<i>sometimes the most important ones.</i><br />
<br />
<i>If someone loves you, give love back to them in</i><br />
<i>whatever way you can, not only because they love you,</i><br />
<i>but because in a way, they are teaching you to love</i><br />
<i>and how to open your heart and eyes to things.</i><br />
<br />
<i>If someone hurts you, betrays you, or breaks your</i><br />
<i>heart, forgive them, for they have helped you learn</i><br />
<i>about trust and the importance of being cautious to</i><br />
<i>whom you open your heart.</i><br />
<br />
<i>Make every day count. Appreciate every moment and take</i><br />
<i>from those moments everything that you possibly can</i><br />
<i>for you may never be able to experience it again. Talk</i><br />
<i>to people that you have never talked to before, and</i><br />
<i>listen to what they have to say.</i><br />
<br />
<i>Let yourself fall in love, break free, and set your</i><br />
<i>sights high. Hold your head up because you have every</i><br />
<i>right to. Tell yourself you are a great individual and</i><br />
<i>believe in yourself, for if you don't believe in</i><br />
<i>yourself, it will be hard for others to believe in</i><br />
<i>you.</i><br />
<br />
<i>You can make anything you wish of your life. Create</i><br />
<i>your own life and then go out and live it with</i><br />
<i>absolutely no regrets.</i><br />
<br />
<i>And if you love someone tell them, for you never know</i><br />
<i>what tomorrow may have in store.</i><br />
<br />
<i>Learn a lesson in life each day that you live! Today</i><br />
<i>is the tomorrow you were worried about yesterday. Was</i><br />
<i>it worth it?</i></div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1837935187662786017.post-5664495931660043392010-03-18T15:30:00.000-04:002010-03-18T15:31:56.466-04:00I Will Not Go…I’m sure that we are all at least passingly familiar with this quote:<br /><br /><div style="text-align: center; font-style: italic;">“Do not go gentle into that good night.”<br /></div><br />We all have some feeling that this small quote evokes in us. It’s part of a larger poem written by Dylan Thomas in 1945. He seems to have written it almost as a memorial to his father, who was seriously ill at the time. This poem challenges us to step back and take a look at how we are living and what we’re doing with our time here.<br /><br />Are you going quietly into that good night?<br /><br />That’s going to be my question to you for today. How are YOU living? Are you making the most of your precious time here or are you waiting or squandering or simply existing?<br /><br />I’ve often talked about the preciousness of life and how it is up to you to take the reins and live your own life. It’s a big thing for me. I spent a good amount of my own life not living for myself. Oh, I lived a life and I did have a good amount of accomplishments that I am indeed proud of. However, I was trying to live for other people’s expectations and how other people thought I should live.<br /><br />You know what? I was completely miserable living that way. It seemed that I was a constant failure. Which really shouldn’t come as any surprise to anyone. This is YOUR life and only YOU can live it. No one else can tell you how to live your life. It’s yours to do with what YOU choose.<br /><br />Sure, you can give away your ability to make that choice for your life. I see that happening all the time. But honestly, that’s just chicken shit. Allowing someone else to make decisions for your life is weak and a poor attempt to avoid responsibility for your life. At the end of the day, YOU are the one that gets to live with your life.<br /><br />I’m not saying that it’s going to be an easy road. Life never is. What I’m saying is that regardless of how you choose to live, remember that you are responsible for those choices. You can’t pass that off to anyone else.<br /><br />I was in the car the other day and I heard a song that I hadn’t listened to in a long while. It’s called “Songs of Life” by Brett Michaels. The chorus goes like this:<br /><br /><div style="text-align: center; font-style: italic;">Love and pain and sacrifice<br />Flesh and blood, all the songs of life.<br />You said I will not go quietly in the night<br />You got to stand and fight<br /></div><br />Read that again and tell me why you aren’t fighting for what you want right now. This is YOUR LIFE!! You only get to do it once. It’s not easy, nor should it be. This World isn’t on your side. It doesn’t want you to stand up and shine for everyone else around you. The world wants you to simply get by and stay in line. Is that the kind of life you want? Take a look deep into your heart and tell me that you just want to shuffle in line all through your life.<br /><br />So, what are you going to do about it? How are you going to live life out loud?<br /><br />Start small if you’re not used to this. Figure out what you want from YOUR life and start with the small things. Build up your courage and confidence that you CAN live your life for yourself.<br /><br />Try this…Figure out who in your life is supportive and who is trying to live your life for you. Then STOP LISTENING TO THOSE PEOPLE LIVING YOUR LIFE! Don’t be mean about it, just tell them, “This is my life, not yours, and I’m going to live it the way I want.” You just might be surprised at what happens and how much happier you feel about your life.<br /><br />Don’t worry; it might be a bit scary at first. Change always is, as is doing things for yourself all on your own. You can do it! I believe in you. No matter who you are, you have everything it takes to succeed right inside you already.<br /><br />I know that I’ve used this quote here before, but it fits, so you get it again to close the thought today. :-)<br /><br /><div style="text-align: center; font-style: italic;">Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.<br /> – Marianne Williamson<br /></div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1837935187662786017.post-80387243455937426472010-03-05T13:38:00.001-05:002010-03-05T13:41:36.959-05:00Stand up and dance…So, I was online a couple nights ago and I ended up on Youtube. OK…ok…I know, I need a life. Sue me.<br /><br />I was loading up one of my favorite clips from the group “Playing for Change” and a thought popped into my head. After a quick search, I found what I was looking for…Mr. Matt Harding. Or, as some people might know him…That guy that dances really badly on the Internet. If you haven’t heard about him take a second a watch this little clip.<br /><br /><div style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zlfKdbWwruY">"Where the Hell is Matt?"</a><br /></div><br />Now, having watched that, answer me this question…<br /><br /><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-weight: bold;">What makes Matt so special that people from all around the world wanted to come out and dance badly with him?</span><br /></div><br />If you think you’ve got a great, deep, philosophical, meaningful answer…hold that thought. :-)<br /><br />See, I don’t think that there’s anything at all that special about Matt Harding. Sorry Matt. :-) He’s really just like any of us. If you doubt me, check out how he describes himself on his site…<br /><br /><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-style: italic;">“Matt is a 32-year-old deadbeat from Connecticut who used to think that all he ever wanted to do in life was make and play videogames.”</span><br /></div><br />See what I mean? Now, don’t get me wrong. There is something about Matt and he sums it up in the next sentence…<br /><br /><div style="text-align: center; font-style: italic;">“Matt achieved this goal pretty early and enjoyed it for a while, but eventually realized there might be other stuff he was missing out on.”<br /></div><br />See, Matt realized that there REALLY is a great big old World out there and that life is what happens outside, not what goes on in your office, building, or cube at work. Even more than that, he DID something about it. He chose to dance.<br /><br />I believe that music and dance and other forms of art are things that unite everyone, no matter where they live, what race or religion they are, or how they live right now. We all can be moved by music, to action or to tears. We all can feel that joy and happiness in dancing wherever you are, no matter how bad you might dance. Those are things that speak directly to the human spirit. Things that join us together and help us to push aside the things that divide us.<br /><br />I read and see SO many things every day that attempt to emphasize our differences and try to pull us apart, drawing those lines in the sand. We’ve all seen it and sadly, I think most people tend to believe those things. Or rather, they tend to focus on those things that make us different. I would submit to you that, yes, everyone is different and honestly, that is a wonderful thing. But today, in our World today, it’s the things that unite us and give us a commonality that are important.<br /><br />We’ve lost sight of the fact that we are all HUMAN. We are all residents of planet Earth. We are all in this together.<br /><br />Today, I’ve got another challenge for you. It’s really a simple one. :-)<br /><br /><div style="text-align: center;">Dance.<br /></div><br />That’s right. Just dance. Celebrate the fact that you are part of the human race and dance. When you’re standing in line at the grocery store. Dance. When you’re getting gas for your car. Dance. After work, during work, with friends or family or even neighbors. Turn up the car stereo or sing on your own. Just don’t miss another single day to realize that you are a part of something huge and wonderful. Don’t miss another moment to feel that incredible blessing that we call life or to share it with someone else. Anyone else. We’ve all been given the same blessing. I think it’s time we ALL started celebrating together in that fact.<br /><br />Come dance with me today. Let’s laugh and sing and most important, DANCE. I’ll be the one looking like a spaz. Not that I really care anyway. :-)Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1837935187662786017.post-7863650829947060282010-03-03T15:22:00.000-05:002010-03-03T15:24:08.147-05:00My question is WHY?It’s the 3 year old question that keeps coming to my mind over and over and over again. It’s something that I actually pride myself on asking. I think that far too often, people don’t ask that wonderful question WHY. We have been conditioned to simply accept and. I think, told that we are too incompetent to understand, so it’s just better to let someone else make decisions for us.<br /><br />I found that I have a great response to someone proposing that attitude for my life. It’s very simple and easy to remember. In fact, it’s just one word.<br /><br />BULLSHIT!<br /><br />So what, you may be asking yourself, set him off THIS time? :-)<br /><br />Ha Ha! It doesn’t seem to take much anymore. I’m not sure if that means I’m getting cranky and cantankerous in my old age, or if I’m actually thinking clearer and requiring more from the World and people around me. Either way, it means that you get to hear me rant about yet another topic here today. :-)<br /><br />I was watching the movie Legion last night. It’s a good action flick with a fair plot and story. But what captured my attention was the message that was presented. And that’s what got me asking that question why again. At one point in the movie, one character, Jeep Hanson, and the archangel Michael are talking. I won’t give away the plot or the movie, but let me present you with a quote from Michael to Jeep.<br /><br /><span style="font-style: italic;">“When God chose your kind as the object of His love, I was the first in all Heaven to bow down before you. My love, my hope for Mankind was no less than His. But I have watched you trample that gift. I’ve watched you kill each other over race and greed. Wage war over dust and rubble and words in old books. And yet in the midst of all this darkness, I see some people who will not be bound. I see some people who will not give up even they know all hope is lost. Some people who realize that being lost is so close to being found.”</span><br /><br />Read that quote again. Go ahead, I can wait. :-)<br /><br />It’s really a fairly accurate description of the World in which we live. And it got me thinking. So, my question for you to ponder today is simply this:<br /><br /><div style="text-align: center; font-weight: bold;">Why is it that there are so few people that inspire hope, that give kindness, and that make the right choice even when there is no hope or they understand exactly how high the cost might be?<br /></div><br />Don’t get me wrong, I completely understand how easy the wrong choice usually is and how tempting that path becomes. I know, because I’ve been down that path myself. I’m sure we all have. But there are those people among us that, more often than not, make that hard, right choice. They are the ones that show that it’s possible to live and love with honor, integrity, compassion, and hope.<br /><br />They are also not usually the famous, rich, or powerful. Sadly, that is a failing that we of the entire world have responsibility in. Look around at the people that are rich and famous. Sure, some of them, some of the time, stand up with honor and bring hope to those around them. But, at least for me, there’s always that thought that it’s simply for the publicity and the photographers. I hope that I’m wrong, but something tells me I’m probably not.<br /><br />Now, I’m always one to throw down a gauntlet and offer up a challenge. :-)<br /><br />So where do you fall in life? Are you one of those that consistently trample this gift we call life? Or are you one that tries to do the right thing, regardless of how hard it might be, and inspire hope for better things in those around you? Do you fall somewhere in the middle? Or do you vacillate between the two?<br /><br />Once you’ve taken that hard look and now know how you choose to value life, ask yourself this question:<br /><br /><div style="text-align: center; font-weight: bold;">Do you want to be better and more than you are right now?<br /></div><br />This is especially important if you have children or are around them. See, kids look up to adults and all of them are taking in what we do and say. That’s how we learn. That’s how we come to understand life and how to live in it. Honestly, what kind of example are you being?<br /><br />You have everything you need in order to be and do better right inside you. We all do. None of us is lacking in ability, it sees that it’s willpower and integrity that we lack. It seems that we tend not to care about the consequences of our choices or what our choices say about ourselves. It seems that we would rather choose the World than the values of honor and integrity.<br /><br />What I’m trying to say, in its simplest form, is that it all come down to YOUR choices. You chose each and every day where you stand, which side you’re on.<br /><br />I would submit that in order for us to change the World, we first need to change our choices and make certain that Right has greater value than easy and Honor and Integrity are placed at the top for everyone else to see.<br /><br />Come walk this path with me. It’s not the easiest one to walk, there’s not as much glory along the way, but I’ll walk it with you and together, we can change the World.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1837935187662786017.post-2019558728183802942010-02-28T10:35:00.002-05:002010-02-28T10:38:47.659-05:00You Deserve What??It is really an interesting World that we live in today. We have the most that we have ever had in all of our history. There are more people living today than ever before. And yet, SO many people have this belief that they have a right, an entitlement, to everything and anything that they want. There seems to be this belief that we are owed something, simply because of how improved things are in our World today.<br /><br />I think that today, we should challenge that attitude. :-)<br /><br />So, let’s turn to our favorite Mr. Webster and see what he says about Entitlement.<br /><br />Entitlement is:<br /> The state or condition of being entitled, or belief that one is deserving of or entitled to certain privileges.<br /><br />And Entitled means:<br /> To furnish with proper grounds for seeking or claiming something.<br /><br />So, it looks as though entitlement is a state where we believe that we have proper grounds to claim certain privileges. You know…I think that’s fairly accurate. My question today though, is does it really apply to us as people living in the World today?<br /><br />What are we entitled to?<br /><br />You hear about it every day, some of us experience it and some of us might even believe it applies to ourselves. That’s a belief that in some way we deserve something; that it’s owed to us. Really? Honestly, I think not. At least not how most people choose to interpret this. :-)<br /><br />Most people that they are entitled to some combination of the following:<br /><br /><div style="text-align: left;"><ul><li>A good job</li><li>Freedoms (depending on where you live)</li><li>A place to live</li><li>Food to eat</li><li>Children</li><li>Love</li><li>Faith</li><li>Happiness</li></ul></div><br />This list is probably MUCH longer, but you get the idea.<br /><br />The bad thing is; we’re not entitled to any of those things. We may WANT them, and most of us will WORK for them, but in and of ourselves, we don’t DESERVE them just because. None of those things in this list are just given to us. Even here in the United States, freedom and faith are not just given to us. Freedom has cost MANY lives and lots of blood to gain, as had faith no matter what you believe.<br /><br />It seems to me that most people today believe that they are entitled to some sort of handout or assistance. Unfortunately, this attitude is being encouraged by Governments, Minority Rights Groups, Religions, and many, many others. Sadly, there are LOTS of people that accept this and even come to rely on this. They would rather choose a form of slavery and dependence over taking care of themselves.<br /><br />Argue all you want about the people that sadly find themselves in a position of needing assistance and how they don’t choose it, but you all know the reality of the 100+ to that one that choose to and live off the system.<br /><br />I asked lots of my friends about what they felt they were entitled to in this life. I got a lot of great answers back. The common consensus and my thoughts too, is that in reality, we are ENTITLED to nothing. There are no guarantees in this life. What we get comes from how hard we try and if you want more then you have to roll up your sleeves and work your ass off for it.<br /><br />So take a moment and think about all that you might have, and remember that YOU did all that. YOU made it happen. YOU are responsible for where you are at. And it’s 100% up to YOU if you want to have more or be better.<br /><br />YOU can do it. I believe in you.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1837935187662786017.post-8361301680572297272010-01-25T14:14:00.000-05:002010-01-25T14:15:26.989-05:00I like Silk and Lace…Welcome back my friends and readers!<br /><br />You KNEW that I’d have to follow the last post with this one. :-) Fair is fair.<br /><br />So today…I’m making a call for all the REAL Women to stand up!<br /><br />OK…ok…now, almost all of you, sit back down. :-)<br /><br />I’m sure that you all THINK you’re real women, but I’m not so sure. Just like every guy wants to think of himself as a REAL Man, I know that all you women want to think of yourself as a REAL Woman.<br /><br />So, let’s look for a second at what a REAL Woman looks like. Shall we?<br /><br />Now, before we go ANY further, let me say that this is my OPINION. It’s what I believe, just like with the men, and it’s what I think fits in the right ways. If you want to yell at me about my opinion, do us both a favor and don’t. :-)<br /><br />Moving right along…<br /><br />Our World has painted a horrible picture of women. Not just in generally, but specifically as well. You are all told that REAL women are size 2’s, with 36DD, mothers, CEOs, and master of all you survey.<br /><br />How STUPID and completely wrong!<br /><br />It’s this warped and twisted mentality that absolutely pisses me off. REAL Women are NOT that. Not at all. You weren’t designed and made for all that. Sorry, but you weren’t.<br /><br />Women were made to be the counterpoint to a Man. If you go biblical, you were made as a helpmate. A companion and a partner. If you just want to go with what feels right…you were made to be treasured, loved, and protected.<br /><br />Let me make a little list here, by no means completely comprehensive.<br /><br />REAL Women…<br /> Are NOT obsessive about their size in any of the “standard” measurements<br /> Are confident and happy in themselves<br /> Know that work and family are opposing choices<br /> Make the world a better place<br /><br />Our World LOVES to lie to us. The biggest and most damaging lie, I think, that the World has told women is that you HAVE to be it all. You HAVE to be the best Mother and the toughest employee and the hardest fighter around. I’m sorry…but that simply is NOT true.<br /><br />You may not like it, but in order to BE the best Mother, you have to be there as a Mother. You can’t be the best and work 90 hours a week. Sorry, it just won’t happen.<br /><br />Everyone in this world is called upon to make choices and sacrifices. You can be a great Mother OR you can be the Boss at work. You can’t cut it both ways. There is only SO much time on hand and we all have to decide where our time gets focused.<br /><br />You aren’t supposed to wear the pants for your family. Honestly, are you comfortable when you have to? It’s supposed to be the Man’s role to lead and listen to his closest counselor, YOU. You see things in a different way than he does. And BOTH ways are valid.<br /><br />I’m going to say something that will probably get me in trouble with a whole lot of women. Like the rest of this won’t. :-)<br /><br />Women are not the same as men. There are things that a Man does that you shouldn’t or can’t. And vice versa. There is NOTHING wrong with that. Honest.<br /><br />I think that a REAL Woman is one that laughs a lot. Happiness is the soul of a real woman. You can’t love if you’re not happy. It just doesn’t work. Women were made for and from love. It is true, you are the weaker sex. So what? That’s the way you were made. Men were made stronger so that we might be able to protect you. You are the fairer sex. I think that’s AWESOME! There is no Man that is half as beautiful as the plainest Woman. That’s the way you were made. Thank God for that.<br /><br />You were made to be a treasure in a Man’s heart. There’s just something about you that we love and want to defend.<br /><br />I think that all women are beautiful. But I think that the REAL Women are absolutely astounding. They don’t worry what the World says. They simply know that the best thing in the world is being themselves, just the way they were made.<br /><br />I read once that the question that every woman’s heart wants the answer to is, “Am I captivating? Am I special to you?” I know that this is true. No matter how old the woman is, her heart wants to know this answer. Who can answer that question? A Real Man can and does.<br /><br />We are a perfectly made pair that stands together against anything the World can throw at us.<br /><br />Today I celebrate the REAL Women. I raise my glass and give thanks that you were made the way you are. Because I am a Real Man. I KNOW that I have what it takes.<br /><br />And, to me, you are absolutely captivating.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1837935187662786017.post-19499594506611232212010-01-22T14:58:00.000-05:002010-01-22T15:00:39.764-05:00Step Up…or Step Aside…OK…I’ve been slacking and I admit it. I’ve let the first 3/4 of the first month of the year go by and I haven’t posted anything out. What a bad way to start the year here. But…sometimes inspiration is a little slow in coming. :-)<br /><br />Today’s little chat is directed mainly to the Men in my audience, although the Women will hopefully enjoy it as well. Also, please remember that this is MY feeling, belief, and thought. It works for me and I hope it will, if not work for you, at least get you thinking about things in a different way.<br /><br />Alright Men! Let’s talk a little shop. :-)<br /><br />Think for me for a second, about what you picture when you think of a “Real Man”. Odds are is someone like William Wallace, Jesse James, Batman, or the like. Someone that you can see as always in control and not taking any shit from anyone.<br /><br />Now…take another second and take a hard look at yourself. Do you fit the mold? If you’re honest with yourself, I’m betting that the answer is “No”.<br /><br />Ever stop to think why? Why does the World hate “Real Men”?<br /><br />I think it comes down to a few simple reasons.<br /><br /><div style="text-align: center;">Courage in yourself and to do what’s right.<br />Honor. Internally as well as projected.<br />Strength of heart, mind, and body.<br /></div><br />Now, I’m sure that some men will be saying “Whoa! I’ve got those things.” But the question is do you exhibit those qualities and live up to them when it counts?<br /><br />Men weren’t made to be the nurturing, loving, caring part of our species. We were made to be the defenders, the protectors, the leaders. That is where we fit the best.<br /><br />Now, don’t get me wrong, women can exhibit those qualities and fit those roles too. But be honest, are you really comfortable there? Just like men can exhibit and express love and nurturing as well, but the honest ones will tell you that it feels weird to be like that all the time.<br /><br />So, what’s my point for today? Look at the title again. “Step up or Step aside” Today is a call for all men to do one or the other. Our World today fears us. Men that do the right thing even when it’s not the easy thing. Men with the courage and honor to make their world a better place. Men that will protect what they love in the basest way, physically if necessary.<br /><br />So step up or step aside!<br /><br />Become a real man, or get out of the way for those of us that will be.<br /><br />I refuse to apologize anymore for being a Man. For being strong, rough around the edges, honorable, protective, and courageous. I refuse to bend my knees to the establishment and hide the fact that I’m a Man. I don’t need to get in touch with my feminine side and learn to be anything other than a Man.<br /><br />I will take the reins of leadership for me and my family and I will blaze the path for us all. I will lead by example and by direction. Sure, sometimes I might lead us astray, but I know I will be able to get us back on course soon enough. I will have the strength of my spirit, heart, mind, and body to know that I can and will lead my loved ones. I will also be humble enough to accept advice from my loved ones and listen with an open mind, whether or not I decide to follow that advice. I will be strong enough to accept the consequences of my choices, good or bad.<br /><br />I don’t think that I’m asking for the impossible from my brothers. Sure, it’ll be difficult at the start. There will be people in your life that don’t want you to change. There will be people that don’t want you to lead. There will even be spouses that will try to keep you from becoming that leader. Remember this though, the reason for that is simple fear. Fear of change. Fear of a loss of control. Fear of harm.<br /><br />Don’t get upset or frustrated with them. SHOW them. Just start being a real man and let them see that it really is for the best. Don’t worry about making mistakes. I know that you’ll make them. Hell, you’re human, it goes with the job. :-) Just make it right and move on.<br /><br />A big fear that I think most men will have in this, is the fear of not being able to do it. The fear of not measuring up. The simple fear of not having what it takes.<br /><br />LISTEN UP BROTHERS!<br /><br />YOU are a MAN. You have what it takes. It is as much a part of you as your testicles. :-)<br /><br />A word of warning though as we start this worldwide transformation…start slow. Don’t overdo it and become a tyrant in your home. Always remember that you are the defender and protector of those that you love. If you have to make a tough decision, err on the side of protecting. And always lead with love. That’s what people will respond to, that’s the right way to lead and become a Real Man.<br /><br />Today, I’m going to leave you with a poem. Yes, that’s right a poem. :-) Know that I have faith in you and that your progression will make our world a better place. So, my brothers, raise your heads, thump your chests, and let out an animal roar. It’s time for the Real Men to Step Up and the pretenders to Step Aside.<br /><br /><br /><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-weight: bold;">To Any Little Boy's Father</span><br /><br />There are little eyes upon you, and<br />they're watching night and day,<br />There are little ears that quickly take<br />in everything you say,<br />There are little hands all eager to do<br />everything you do,<br />And a little boy who's dreaming of the<br />day he'll be like you.<br /><br />You're the little fellow's idol, you're<br />the wisest of the wise,<br />In his little mind, about you no<br />suspicions ever rise.<br />He believes in you devoutly, holds that<br />all you say and do,<br />He will say and do in your way, when he's<br />grown up, just like you.<br /><br />There's a wide-eyed little fellow who<br />believes you're always right,<br />And his ears are always open and he<br />watches day and night,<br />You are setting an example every day in<br />all you do,<br />For the little boy who's waiting to grow<br />up and be like you.<br /></div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1837935187662786017.post-79567860392492646232009-12-23T11:44:00.000-05:002009-12-23T11:45:04.574-05:00Tis the Season…Wow. Another year is almost over. I can hardly believe that we’ve made it through another 356 days at this point. So much has happened in this last year, good and bad, happy and sad. And through it all we’ve managed to remain sane (well, mostly) and keep up the glad spirits.<br /><br />Before I go any further today, I want to take a moment and give a few shout outs to some very important people in my own life. I don’t know if you take the time to publicly and openly express the things that sit in your heart to those that matter in your life, but if you don’t, I’d encourage you to take some time and do just that. I have some many wonderful, loving and supportive people in my life that sometimes I can’t even begin to have the time to tell them all how much they mean to me. I feel overwhelmingly blessed to have them all in my life.<br /><br />So I’m taking a bit and sharing my love with a few of them all here. SN, JC, MD, AW…you have all seen me at my lowest this year and before. You have helped me get back on my feet time and time again. Listened to me as I have vented, corrected me when I was wrong, and loved me through it all. From the bottom of my heart, THANK YOU for being in my life and being the people that each of you are. You’re all amazing. :-)<br /><br />Mom, Dad, and sister…you loved me and tolerated me (especially my sister) for my entire life. I know that I haven’t always been the easiest person to love, but I know that you have in your own ways. Know that I will always love you all as well.<br /><br />My boys…all of them. You are the ones that keep me going every single day. You are my most important things in this life. Every day I want to be better, because of you. I love you more than anything and SO much more than I could ever begin to express. You Are Awesome!<br /><br />And everyone that reads through my rantings, my unique perspectives on the World we live in, those that come back every time I post, and those that find me every now and then…Thank you for taking a few moments of your time to read. I said a long time ago that if no one commented or was reading my stuff, I’d just pack it in. So, to you all, you are the ones that keep me going here.<br /><br />Now that all that mushy stuff is done, let’s talk about this season. :-)<br /><br />No matter what you believe in, this is a special time of year. Originally this was a time that people celebrated the passing of the year and the birth of a new one. It was seen as a time of renewal, reflection, and celebration with all those you shared a life with. It was about friends, family, and everyone living in the village. See, that long ago, most people didn’t survive on their own. Life was a joint effort. Everyone helped everyone else. That was just how it was.<br /><br />Today, this season is about frantic shopping and spending. The latest, expensive gadgets. Rushing and running to get it all done at the last minute. Crowds and complaints and an amazing level of frustration and emotions (usually anger).<br /><br />Is this REALLY what it’s all about? Is this how we’ve come to celebrate?<br /><br />Me…I don’t really like this season. Now…before you jump all over me, hear me out. :-)<br /><br />For me and mine, this season is just going to be another day. Sure, it’s the end of the year and we’ll celebrate and exchange gifts and laugh and love some more. But that laughter and love and expressions of caring for one another…that’s an everyday kind of thing. Why should I wait until the malls tell me it’s time to tell someone I love them? Why should I let one single day go by without telling those most important how I feel? What makes this day any different from what every other day should be?<br /><br />My bottom line? It shouldn’t be any different. This feeling that we all want to proclaim is something we should have and show 364 more days of every year. I’m never going to wait to get someone I love a gift to show them that. Why should I?<br /><br />Every day is a blessing and every moment is a gift. I’ve learned in this last year that we are never given any guarantees. So often, I think, we take each day for granted. After all, most days run in the same pattern. It becomes commonplace and expected. When tragedy hits, we spend a good amount of time dealing with guilt and regret.<br /><br />“I should have said this”<br /><br />“I should have done that”<br /><br />I have a hope for everyone that reads my stuff. I hope that you have a moment of epiphany. That your thoughts and spirits get a good shaking. That you pull the daily film off your eyes and start to see each day as the treasure that it is and the joy that it can be. I hope that every moment becomes precious to you. Regardless of where you are, what you are doing, or whom you are with. Learn to see the beauty and experience the magic of this wonderful gift that we call life.<br /><br />So, no matter what you believe or how you celebrate…<br /><br />Merry Christmas! I love you all.<br /><br />And, see you next year! :-)Unknownnoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1837935187662786017.post-75160700524419070372009-11-19T13:40:00.001-05:002009-11-19T13:41:47.122-05:00365 Give or Take…It’s been a year today. One year since my almost ex-wife took her life. There’s a part of me that is amazed that it’s already been a year. It certainly doesn’t seem like that long.<br /><br />I’ve taken a look back over this last year, just for myself to see what all has happened. It’s been a rather big year in some ways, not so much in others. Basically, my year has been just like everyone else’s…for the most part. :-)<br /><br />A very good friend took a moment to remind me exactly where I was a year ago. “Last year at this time, you were worried about the Ex fighting over your son, and getting yourself a good attorney.” And in one heartbreaking moment, all that was turned on its head and gone.<br /><br />It’s weird to me sometimes. I spent nine years with her and shared so many things. But at the end of the day, I look back at everything that happened and I know that I became someone that I hated. I did things that I will always regret and feel sorrow over. I felt pain that I had never imagined even being possible.<br /><br />But…I also was blessed to have two amazing boys. I grew to be strong in and over myself. I found confidence and self-worth in my heart and my own eyes. I found my own path of spirituality that works for me. And I met amazing people that have become some of my closest and most dear friends.<br /><br />This last year has seen so many blessings and trials for us. As I’m certain it has for each of you.<br /><br />But let’s get to the point today. It’s almost Thanksgiving here in the States. It’s funny to me that we all recognize certain times of the year to do things that we should really be doing each and every day. :-)<br /><br />Thanksgiving is a time to stuff yourself like a dead turkey and watch all the special football games…right?<br /><br />Sure…and Easter is because a rabbit poops eggs.<br /><br />Thanksgiving is the holiday where we are supposed to reflect on the things that we are thankful for in our lives. Like I said…it’s something we SHOULD do each and every day. But if you don’t, at least do it on this one day.<br /><br />It’s an interesting question really. What are YOU thankful for?<br /><br />Sure, we’ve all got those stock answers. My family, my friends, job, blah, blah, blah, blah. How boring and rote are we? If you catch yourself using these answers this year, you have my permission to slap yourself.<br /><br />Really?? That’s all you can come up with to be thankful for? How about we dig a little deeper and make you think some? Hhmm?<br /><br />Me…I’m thankful for:<br /><br />• Every trial that I’ve gone through. Each one has provided me with an amazing opportunity to grow. No, I haven’t enjoyed going through a single one, but I’ve found the blessing for each trial I have made it through.<br /><br />• People that I have lost in my life. Some people have walked away, some I’ve just lost touch with, while another has taken that final step away. However, every one that has walked away has taught me something about relationships. They have taught me something about myself. Ultimately, they have all helped me to appreciate those that are still in my life.<br /><br />• Being blessed with the ability to laugh and find funny, even in the hardest and darkest of times. I know many people that can’t do this and they languish and wallow in misery. There isn’t a release valve for them. God graced me with that release valve and I can’t imagine living without it.<br /><br />• Constant background music and occasional theme music in my life. Whether it’s a song on the radio, my best friend playing on the guitar, or simply hearing the wind moving through the trees. The life is SO full of the amazing and miraculous every single day, and yet, very few of us ever take the time to notice it. It’s almost as if we’ve become inundated with everything to the point where our mind filters it all out.<br /><br />Those are just a few of the not-so-normal things that I’m thankful for each and every day. Sure, my life isn’t exactly what you’d call easy and stress free, but it’s MY life. The only one that I’ve got. And, really, we all only get one choice from two options…you can live and be miserable and die, or you can live and be happy and then die. The beginning and the end are already set for everyone. We only get to choose how we spend the middle part.<br /><br />Take off your filters and make this Thanksgiving the one that last you the entire year.<br /><br />And now, from the bottom of my heart. That crusty, flabby, fatty part of the heart I will leave you with this…<br /><br />Thank you for reading and joining me here. May all your days be blessed with more than you could ever imagine asking for.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1837935187662786017.post-86327618659892547082009-11-16T13:54:00.001-05:002009-11-16T13:56:59.658-05:00Something for my sons…I’m a single Father. I don’t get any breaks. I wade through every day, first at work, then at home with my beautiful 3 year old son. I can honestly say; I’m tired most of the time. Mentally, physically, emotionally tired. Don’t get me wrong, I’m loving every minute of it, but it is just me raising this little knight and trying to teach him what it means to be a strong, upstanding young man.<br /><br />I’ve been asked often about how I’m raising him. I’ve got two other boys and I try to be a good example for them as well. But they don’t live with me, so they don’t get to see it day in and day out. But I found myself thinking about that question.<br /><br />“How do you raise a child in today’s World?”<br /><br />I look around at the kids that live in our World and I’m amazed at what I see. Where are the values? The morals? Hell…where are the good old fashioned beatings that kept kids straight when I was young?<br /><br />Now, please, don’t think that I’m simply going to beat my son straight. :-) Tempting…but no.<br /><br />He WILL know what consequences are and he will have a firm foundation in the things that I believe in as well. What are those things? I’ve talked about them all here before.<br /><br /><div style="text-align: center;">• Honor<br />• Integrity<br />• Respect<br />• Faith<br />• Honesty<br /></div><br />To name off a few.<br /><br />I listen to kids today, little kids 8 or 10 years old, talking back to their parents. In some cases, cussing them out too. I have never been tempted to smack another person’s child, but I HAVE been tempted to smack the parents. What in the world could they be thinking?!<br /><br />I will admit; I got into my fair share of trouble as a kid. But I had a healthy respect for my parents. Often, my Mom more than my Dad and I couldn’t even conceive of swearing at them. I think I’d still be picking my teeth up, even now.<br /><br />What’s worse is that I hear some people and media, deriding them very values that I hold most dear. My core values aren’t espoused anymore. No one wants to teach a child these things. Many would rather leave it to TV and then blame a teacher for a child’s behavior. That offends me. So I do the only thing I really can. I will ensure that MY sons know what I believe and how to be their own knights.<br /><br />I found this quote today. I think that it pertains here, even though it was made a long time ago to a very different audience. So please, enjoy the words of General Douglas MacArthur regarding a few core values and what they provide.<br /><br />“<span style="font-style: italic;">Duty, Honor, Country</span>: Those three hallowed words reverently dictate what you ought to be, what you can be, what you will be. They are your rallying points: to build courage when courage seems to fail; to regain faith when there seems to be little cause for faith; to create hope when hope becomes forlorn.<br />Unhappily, I possess neither that eloquence of diction, that poetry of imagination, nor that brilliance of metaphor to tell you all that they mean.<br /><br />The unbelievers will say they are but words, but a slogan, but a flamboyant phrase. Every pedant, every demagogue, every cynic, every hypocrite, every troublemaker, and I am sorry to say, some others of an entirely different character, will try to downgrade them even to the extent of mockery and ridicule.<br /><br />But these are some of the things they do. They build your basic character. They mold you for your future roles as the custodians of the nation's defense. They make you strong enough to know when you are weak, and brave enough to face yourself when you are afraid. They teach you to be proud and unbending in honest failure, but humble and gentle in success; not to substitute words for actions, not to seek the path of comfort, but to face the stress and spur of difficulty and challenge; to learn to stand up in the storm but to have compassion on those who fall; to master yourself before you seek to master others; to have a heart that is clean, a goal that is high; to learn to laugh, yet never forget how to weep; to reach into the future yet never neglect the past; to be serious yet never to take yourself too seriously; to be modest so that you will remember the simplicity of true greatness, the open mind of true wisdom, the meekness of true strength. They give you a temper of the will, a quality of the imagination, a vigor of the emotions, a freshness of the deep springs of life, a temperamental predominance of courage over timidity, of an appetite for adventure over love of ease. They create in your heart the sense of wonder, the unfailing hope of what next, and the joy and inspiration of life. They teach you in this way to be an officer and a gentleman.”<br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">General Douglas MacArthur</span>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1837935187662786017.post-85733482789205202272009-11-13T11:04:00.001-05:002009-11-13T11:08:25.765-05:00All We Want Is Love…If you’ve never seen Christopher Titus, I would definitely suggest you go pick up his newest stand up, “Love is Evol”. See, he presents real life lessons in such a funny way; you might actually listen to them.<br /><br />We seem SO stubborn when we hear anything resembling a life lesson. We just really don’t want to hear it. It’s almost as if, for us to hear it would make us less in some way. Like we can’t handle our lives or the situations we find ourselves in. I’m going to borrow heavily from Mr. Titus today. He’s like a hilarious Dr. Phil. :-)<br /><br />Have you ever been in a bad relationship? HAHAHAHA…that’s like asking if you’re a living, breathing, human being. We’ve ALL been there. We’ve ALL been in that relationship with that person that we should NEVER have been in. We buried our heads in the sand and ignored ALL the things that should have been big red signs saying “GET THE HELL OUT NOW!”<br /><br />So, why do we stay? Why do we let these people continue to tear us apart, moment by moment and day by day?<br /><br />Because we’re all addicts. We want LOVE. And for that little drug called LOVE we will do damn near anything. We will stay with someone, trying to change them, trying to make the better, when every SANE person tells us to run. For that drug, LOVE, we suck it up. We hope it will be better. We hope that WE can be better. We take everything that is thrown at us and for a lot of us…we APOLOGIZE to that idiot for the things THEY did! You know what I’m talking about.<br /><br />Why do we take it? What makes LOVE so powerful a force over us that we stay with those assholes?<br /><br />It’s what we were made for. We are a species that is built for relationships. We want them. It’s a comfort to us and it hardwired into our brains to pursue it. We all want to feel special to someone. We want to know that someone cares and believes in us. That someone’s got our back in life.<br /><br /><div style="text-align: center;">“`Cause nobody wants to be the last one there.<br />'Cause everyone wants to feel like someone cares.<br />Someone to love with my life in their hands.<br />There`s gotta be somebody for me like that.”<br />Nickelback – Gotta Be Somebody<br /></div><br />So we take it and we suck it up and we hope that next month will be different, that next year will be good. And we stay. And, in the words of Christopher Titus…<span style="font-size:130%;">”THAT’S YOUR LIFE!”</span><br /><br />But…<br /><br />How do we react when McDonald’s screws up your order? When someone cuts you off in traffic? When the cable is out? Does this get you thinking yet?<br /><br />Because, guess what? You don’t get a rebate at the end of your life for staying with an asshole. Death doesn’t hand out coupons because you spent three years with that bitch. Wake up my friends!<br /><br /><div style="text-align: center;">YOU are worth being happy.<br />YOU are worth being respected.<br />YOU are worth being loved.<br /></div><br />And let me close with a word to the other side. If YOU are that asshole, if you won’t pass this on to your significant other because you think they might wake up. You get one last chance. You’ve got a LOT to make amends for. You need to go to them and BEG for a chance to make it right. You need to do whatever it takes to make them feel special again. You need to take everything you THINK you deserve and throw it right out the F-ing window. On bended knees, you should welcome them home and sex them like you’ve NEVER sexed anyone else before. You need to make dinner, breakfast, and shower them with real love.<br /><br />Because we don’t get a rebate. We only get one shot. Make it your best one.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1837935187662786017.post-43563578582496107772009-11-03T14:31:00.000-05:002009-11-03T14:32:18.052-05:00Confessions…I’ve posted many times my thoughts and beliefs on many different topics and subjects and I’ve taken this last break from writing to attempt to figure a few things out about myself. I think everyone should take time for personal reflection. We don’t know everything about anything, and most of us know even less about our own selves. Now, I know that most people wouldn’t throw their personal revelations out onto the Internet for general consumption by anyone, but, if you’ve been with me for a while, you know I’m nothing but different from most people. “Special”, I think my friends like to say. :-)<br /><br />So, I’m going to do a few posts about my own personal revelations. I hope that there might be people that they help, or that they are entertaining at the least. If anything, maybe I can encourage you to seek your own revelations. They are always worth it.<br /><br />*****************<br /><br />I am broken. I know it.<br /><br />It’s funny to me (Not funny HA HA, but funny weird) that my memories of my childhood are VERY vague and I really don’t have all that many of them. I talk with people all the time that have great memories of their childhoods. They can give details and specific times and whatnot. Not me. I’m fuzzy for most all of my early life.<br /><br />My recent life? The trying times and things that I’ve been through? Those are most all crystal clear. Even the memories that I wish I couldn’t remember. Hmmm… I wonder.<br /><br />Does that mean that I had an extremely boring childhood? Could be. I wasn’t a real bad kid. Sure, I got into trouble, what kid doesn’t? But I never really pushed the limits. I was contented to simply exist within my parent’s rules. At least, I think I was. I can’t really recall.<br /><br />Does that make me broken? Certainly not. Maybe I’m just too lazy to recall those memories. Maybe I just don’t have a need, reason, or desire to recall them.<br /><br />No, what makes me broken is how my mind and my spirit has taken the events in my life and twisted them. And I do mean that they’ve been twisted. I know that my reactions aren’t always what others would be in the same situation. I know that there are SO many walls and filters that have become my source for responses that it’s almost downright silly. Want an example? That’s easy. I’ll use one that just happened a little while ago.<br /><br />I won’t go into details, but the gist is this. I can very easily walk away from someone, and STILL manage to stay attached and friendly to them. I don’t know many people that can do that. Either you are with them or you aren’t. But I’m very capable of being with someone and sharing a part of my life, and yet walk away in an instant.<br /><br />I know that my relationships have suffered because of this. And I’m certain that a few of my friends shake their heads and wonder what the hell I’m doing. I guess it just seems that I don’t care. That after a certain point, my heart shuts off and I’m done.<br /><br />I’m sure that the few people that really know me have spent their fair share of energy in digging to find that little nugget of real me. Despite what I present, I’m not a real easy person to get to know. Sure, you’ll find out about all the surface things and the World things that have happened in my life. I’ve presented many of them here. But do you know me because of that? Absolutely not. In fact, there are very few people that could anticipate my response to things. And even they are surprised sometimes.<br /><br />Like I said…<br /><br />I am broken. I know it. And, I’m OK with that.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1837935187662786017.post-3695214529152814752009-08-20T14:59:00.000-04:002009-08-20T15:00:39.143-04:00Makin’ it work<div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-style: italic;">“Our greatest joy-and our greatest pain comes in our relationships with others.”</span><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-weight: bold;">- Stephen R. Covey</span><br /></div><br />Today, I want to get everyone thinking about something that’s near and dear to everyone heart. So, let me just put it out there now…How do you make a relationship, any relationship, work?<br /><br />It’s kind of funny to me, in that, here recently; I’ve had LOTS of people coming to me for help in figuring this very question out. My question to myself is usually…”Why me?” I mean come on…I’ve had two failed marriages, I have several kids, went through a period where I didn’t even speak to any of my family…who the hell am I to answer that question?<br /><br />But it got me thinking. I know…bad sign right? :-)<br /><br />And I started thinking about the why’s and how’s of all my relationships. And more importantly, I remembered all the bad, and sometimes downright AWFUL, advice that I got in answer to my question. Things like:<br /><br /><div style="text-align: left;">• Act like you’re in love until you are…<br />• Marriage is 50-50. You need to give as much, or more, than you take…<br />• You need to have common interests and do things together…<br /></div><br />I’m sorry…but that’s all bullshit! It’s bad advice, it encourages guilt and accusations, and it makes a relationship a competition of who is doing more. I have yet to hear solid, relationship building, workable advice. That’s not to say that there aren’t some good nuggets out there, I just haven’t found THE advice to give. And, if I’m completely honest here, I don’t believe that it’ll ever be found.<br /><br />Everyone is different. As is every relationship, whether it’s a friendship, family, marriage, sex, of any other kind of relationship. There is no one piece of advice, or book, or movie, or anything that will apply to everyone and every situation. Dr. Phil won’t cut it for everyone. :-)<br /><br /><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-style: italic;">“If you’ve never contemplated suicide…you’ve never been in love. If you’ve never thought about murder…you’ve never been divorced.”</span><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-weight: bold;">– Christopher Titus</span><br /></div><br />Let’s face it, human beings are social creatures. Relationships are important to us all. Unfortunately, I don’t ever recall taking a class, or being taught, how to make any of those relationships work. All I’ve ever been told is that a relationship takes work. Great! That sums it all up, right? Not hardly. Yes, relationships are work. But, so is washing my dog, and getting a degree, and keeping a job. Work is not the same and no one has ever explained what relationship work entails.<br /><br />So, getting back on topic…How do you make a relationship work? I can’t tell you that. :-)<br /><br />No, really. I can’t. Because it’ll be different for you than for me. I CAN tell you what I have learned about being in a relationship and how to make it work for me. So what HAVE I learned?<br /><br />I’ve learned that most people don’t have a clue how to be successful in a relationship. We all seem to want to be the “right” one. We want everything to go our way and find it very hard to change directions. It’s easier to blame someone else than it is to admit you’re wrong. That no relationship is 50-50. Some days it’s 90-10, others its 10-90. Sometimes it’s just as important to listen and understand as it is to talk and be heard. My feelings are just as important and valid as yours, but not necessarily the way to go.<br /><br />But, I think that the most important thing that I’ve learned is that the only way I can make a relationship work is if I take care of your needs and they are just as important to me as my own and you take care of mine and feel the same way.<br /><br />See, I believe that, to make any relationship work, you have to get to know that other person inside and out. We all have needs and in a relationship, you become the only one able to meet those needs for that person. That does mean that you have to express those needs and make your own heart known. That is the “work” of a relationship.<br /><br />Now…bring on Dr. Phil! I’m taking his show!<br /><br /><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-style: italic;">Piglet sidled up to Pooh from behind. "Pooh!" he whispered. "Yes, Piglet?" "Nothing," said Piglet, taking Pooh's paw. "I just wanted to be sure of you." </span><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-weight: bold;">~A.A. Milne</span><br /></div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1837935187662786017.post-75475293119383602282009-08-04T12:08:00.001-04:002009-08-04T12:11:29.093-04:00Thank You For Listening…<div style="text-align: center; font-style: italic;">“Listen to the mustn'ts, child. Listen to the don'ts. Listen to the shouldn'ts, the impossibles, the won'ts. Listen to the never haves, then listen close to me... Anything can happen, child. Anything can be.”<br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-weight: bold;">Shel Silverstein</span><br /></div><br /><br />So, I was doing some Google-ing today relating to today’s topic. I was searching for human traits. Specifically, the traits that others thought were the most important and/or the best. I was kind of shocked to see that not a single person listed listening as a top human trait. Hmm…<br /><br />That got me thinking…again. :-)<br /><br />Why is listening not a top human trait? Why is it that all around the world, from personal, private relationships to world governments, miscommunications and misunderstandings abound? In our World of mass media and instantaneous information, why aren’t we listening?<br /><br /><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-style: italic;">"The most basic of all human needs is the need to understand and be understood. The best way to understand people is to listen to them."</span><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-weight: bold;">Ralph Nichols</span><br /></div><br />According to A. Barbour, author of <span style="font-style: italic;">Louder Than Words: Nonverbal Communication</span>, our communications breakdown like this:<br />7 percent verbal (words)<br />38 percent vocal (volume, pitch, rhythm, etc)<br />55 percent body movements (mostly facial expressions)<br /><br />Humans are expressive. In more than simply a vocal way. In fact, we don’t really communicate much verbally. And yet, when you are listening to someone talk to you, are you giving them your full, undivided attention? Are you REALLY listening? I would bet that you aren’t.<br /><br /><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-style: italic;">"There are people who, instead of listening to what is being said to them, are already listening to what they are going to say themselves."</span><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-weight: bold;">Albert Guinon</span><br /></div><br />I think that for most of us, our conversations with other people go something like this.<br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">YOU</span>: Blah, blah, blah…<br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">THEM</span>: I think…blah, <you>(You don’t really hear the rest of what they say because you are too busy thinking up your next statement)<br /><br />Sound like a familiar experience? I bet it does. But don’t worry; the other person is probably doing the same thing back to you. :-)<br /><br /><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-style: italic;">“It is the province of knowledge to speak, and it is the privilege of wisdom to listen.”</span><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">Oliver Wendell Holmes</span><br /></div><br />Listening is one of the most important skills available to a human being. It is what allows us to truly and honestly understand another person. Listening is what makes you feel special, cared about, and loved. It’s what makes us all able to share a world or a life with another person.<br /><br />There is no classroom to learn listening. It’s a skill that is given to us by our parents. All too often today, parents are rushing to pack more into their day. One of the things that gets bumped is taking the time to sit and LISTEN to your children. Show them that they are special and that what they have to say is important to you. In that way, our children will learn what it means to listen. It is reinforced because of how it makes them feel.<br /><br />One of the greatest gifts you can give to a child is the ability to sit quietly and listen completely.<br /><br />Do ya hear me?? :-)</you>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1837935187662786017.post-42442674129827192952009-07-23T11:34:00.001-04:002009-07-23T11:37:02.370-04:00A letter to a Brother I haven’t yet met…Dear JBB,<br /><br /> We haven’t met, yet, and I do hope that someday we will be able to meet and shake hands and get to know one another. I feel like I know you to a certain extent. See, we share a bit in common. It’s more than just the fact that our lives seem to have shared similar experiences. I have been told of some of the things you’ve survived through and often I have survived the same things. More important than that, to me at least, is the fact that we share the same person. In this I’m talking about your Mom.<br /><br />It’s funny to me to think that even though we are not related in any way, I feel as if your Mom is my Mom. We even have a joke that she’s my Internet Mom. :-)<br /><br />I was listening the other day to the song “<span style="font-style: italic;">Mama, I’m Coming Home</span>” by Ozzy Osbourne and it got me thinking. I wanted to share those thoughts with you. It seemed to my heart that you might appreciate them. See, I know what you’re going through right now and while I haven’t been in the exact same situation that you are, I have my own parallels.<br /><br /><div style="text-align: center; font-style: italic;">“Times have changed and times are strange<br />Here I come, but I ain’t the same<br />Mama, I’m coming home<br />Times gone by seem to be<br />You could have been a better friend to me<br />Mama, I’m coming home”<br /></div><br />Now, just reading this verse, it doesn’t seem to be a very friendly song for Mom, right? But think about it this way. He’s really talking to the World. See, we all have the opportunity to give the World a try and eventually we come to find that the World “<span style="font-style: italic;">could have been a better friend to me</span>”. The World, as we find, only looks out for itself. But in the end…”<span style="font-style: italic;">Mama, I’m coming home</span>”.<br /><br /><div style="text-align: center; font-style: italic;">“You took me in and you drove me out<br />Yeah, you had me hypnotized, yeah<br />Lost and found and turned around<br />By the fire in your eyes<br /><br />You made me cry, you told me lies<br />But I can't stand to say goodbye<br />Mama, I'm comin’ home<br />I could be right, I could be wrong<br />It hurts so bad it's been so long<br />Mama, I'm comin’ home<br /><br />Selfish love yeah we're both alone<br />The ride before the fall, yeah<br />But I'm gonna take this heart of stone<br />I just got to have it all”<br /></div><br />I know what it’s like to be sucked in to everything that the World says that it offers. Friends, money, love, fame, power, and lots and lots of things. It’s pretty easy to fall into that trap and once we’re in it, we SO want to just stay there. We often are completely willing to trade those people that honestly want the best for us, for those that want the best FROM us. We get worn down, beaten, broken, and still, the World wants more from us. And in the end...”<span style="font-style: italic;">Mama, I'm comin’ home</span>”<br /><br /><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-style: italic;">“I've seen your face a hundred times</span><br /><span style="font-style: italic;">Everyday we've been apart </span><br /><span style="font-style: italic;">I don't care about the sunshine, yeah</span><br /><span style="font-style: italic;">'Cause mama, mama, I'm comin’ home</span><br /><span style="font-style: italic;">I'm comin’ home</span><br /><span style="font-style: italic;">I'm comin’ home”</span><br /></div><br />I heard this part with new ears, wanting, with all my heart to be present when you are finally able to say this. Wherever I am when this happens, know that I will rejoice with all my heart. I will take a moment, several actually, and know that you have survived again. I will know that you have come home, better than when you first left.<br /><br />I hope that this finds you in good spirits, my brother that I have yet to meet. I pray that you always remember that you are never the sum of your mistakes, but rather, the product of how you chose to live your life. Love amplifies love, compassion begets forgiveness and healing, and you are an important part of many people’s lives. It seems to be a lesson that we all need to revisit from time to time.<br /><br />As the saying goes…<br /><br /><div style="text-align: center; font-style: italic;">God love you Brother, and so do I.<br /></div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1837935187662786017.post-55037511548780374392009-07-22T15:24:00.001-04:002009-07-22T15:27:12.989-04:00I’ll have a side of Hope with that…So, I’m getting ready for work this morning, letting my mind wander, as is my wont. And I‘m listening to the comedy station on my phone, as I usually do, and one of my favorite comedians comes on, Christopher Titus. Now, I tried…really I did…to transcribe the bit that he was doing, but, let’s face it, I have zero future as a secretary or transcriptionist. :-)<br /><br />So, here’s the link to the bit. <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NyS9d4BbjCY">Titus</a>. Now, before you go any further, I insist that you go listen to this one. It’s only 5 minutes and 14 seconds. So go…I’ll wait…<br /><br />Back? Great. Now, one of the things that I love about Titus is that he makes me think about things. Things in my own life and about the World in general. I believe that that is the best kind of comedy. The kind that makes you think. That takes the way things are right now in the world, good, bad, or unbelievably stupid, and they question, prod, poke, and make you think about it.<br /><br /><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-style: italic;">“Sanity may be madness but the maddest of all is to see life as it is and not as it should be.”</span><br /></div><div style="text-align: center; font-weight: bold;">Don Quixote<br /></div><br />So, what about Sergeant Pepper? Did that make you think about the World today? I know…I know…I can hear you asking now…<span style="font-style: italic;">This is it? This is his Profound Thought today? Sergeant Pepper?</span><br /><br />Nope. I’m thinking about the very last bit of what Titus said. “The World’s not coming to an end right now. And I had some hope.” And I thought to myself…Do I have some hope right now? Do the people that I care about have hope? What about the World in general? Do you think there is an abundance of hope in this World?<br /><br />Now, the cynic in me wants to loudly shout “No! Hope is at an all time low!” and I’m certain that there are lots of people that would agree with that. But is that the truth of it? For some reason, I’m inclined to say no. So, I thought and thought about hope in the World. Let me give some examples…<br /><br />• Every time a boat full of people throw themselves out into the ocean, in an attempt to reach the US, there is an abundance of hope.<br />• Every time a group of oppressed people band together in an attempt to make the wrong things right, there is an abundance of hope.<br />• Every time an abused child, spouse, or person leaves an abuser, there is an abundance of hope.<br /><br />Now, I’m certain that there will be people pointing to these few examples and saying, “It’s not hope! It’s desperation! They have no other options.” But, I don’t think so. Every desperate choice is fueled by a hope of something better. Hope is the basic underlying belief in any attempt of change, no matter how big or how small.<br /><br /><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-style: italic;">“Once you choose hope, anything's possible.”</span><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-weight: bold;">Christopher Reeves</span><br /></div><br />There was a point in my own life where my hope reserves started scraping bottom. I just didn’t have any hope in anything at all. And then, I met someone that helped me to find that small nugget of hope that was hiding inside me. Today, he’s one of my very best friends. He showed me that life without hope is, in truth, no life at all. That all of life is based on hope. Hope for tomorrow, hope for change, hope for love, peace, friendship.<br /><br /><div style="text-align: center; font-style: italic;">When the world says, "Give up,"<br />Hope whispers, "Try it one more time.”<br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-weight: bold;">Author Unknown</span><br /></div><br />Every time that I look at my sons, I know that familiar surge of hope. I also feel that immense burden of hope. See, I now know that hope is a double-edged sword. Hope is what allows us to carry on in the face of unbelievable trials, to face fear and strife and smile as you make your way through. Hope is also the biggest responsibility we all have to the next generation.<br /><br />WE are the example that children will live up to. WE are the ones that will teach them how to live. WE are the ones that will show them what it truly means to live with hope. And how can you do that if you don’t know how yourself?<br /><br />See, hope is what lets us catch a glimpse of the future. Of what <span style="font-style: italic;">could </span>be. Hope facilitates our own personal belief in tomorrow. That is a precious gift that we are compelled to give to our children.<br />Because what is a World…without hope?<br /><br />Not someplace that I want my children living in. :-)<br /><br />And a World with…well…all the hope in the World?<br /><br />I think Titus sums it up well…<br /><br /><div style="text-align: center; font-style: italic;">“It’s a park. And there’s a white guy, and a black guy, and an Asian guy, and a Latino guy, and, OK, THAT guy, he’s Canadian. Don’t worry about him; they never affect the World much at all. But, you see what they’re doing, honey? That is called praying. And they are doing it for each other. Your Daddy has never seen this in his lifetime. Maybe I was wrong. Maybe this is the best time for you to be born, cuz that right there, that what it means to be an American. And they’re praying for peace and if we can’t have peace…well, that we destroy the people who screwed up the peace. So we can have peace!”<br /></div><br />I’m proud to be living now…in THIS time…in THIS place…on THIS planet. With you. God bless.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1837935187662786017.post-33040491043044792862009-07-13T15:44:00.001-04:002009-07-13T15:46:19.332-04:00What Happened To All My Heroes?<div style="text-align: center; font-style: italic;">“Celebrity-worship and hero-worship should not be confused. Yet we confuse them every day, and by doing so we come dangerously close to depriving ourselves of all real models. We lose sight of the men and women who do not simply seem great because they are famous but are famous because they are great. We come closer and closer to degrading all fame into notoriety.”<br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-weight: bold;">Daniel J. Boorstin</span><br /></div><br />OK…I’ll go ahead and confess this now. My hero is encompassed by no one single person. My heroes are personified values. Honor, Honesty, Integrity, Respect, Compassion, Love. Just to name a few. See, my Dad wanted me to grow up with all the old myths. I was exposed to Heracles, Jason, Zeus, Odin, Thor, King Arthur, and many, many others. With all those old myths, I learned about those values that would eventually come to be an integral part of my life. Sure, the heroes in those old myths were all fallible, and some in great big ways, but that only made the virtues they were embodying all the more important.<br /><br />But, what about the accepted heroes of today? If you were to go to any high school in the country and ask them questions about the old myths, do you think they’d get them right? I don’t.<br /><br />I don’t think that any of them would know what Jason and the Argonauts were questing for, or what Heracles did that was special. Hell…do YOU know the right answers to those questions?<br /><br />Actually…a better question might be; who are your heroes? And keeping in mind Boorstin’s quote above, do YOU confuse hero-worship with celebrity-worship?<br /><br />It seems to me, a bad trend today, that our children are not growing up with the myths and legends that teach and personify the values of a hero. And really…how can we expect our children to become heroes for their generations if we don’t teach them what it means to be a hero in the first place?<br /><br /><div style="text-align: center; font-style: italic;">“The hero is one who kindles a great light in the world, who sets up blazing torches in the dark streets of life for men to see by.”<br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-weight: bold;">Felix Adler</span><br /></div><br />I’ve talked before about what it means to be a hero, so I won’t rehash that here. Rather, I want to talk about why we’ve lost these classical heroes and replaced them with people that are SO far from being heroes?<br /><br />Or maybe that’s an unanswerable question. Why, is a difficult one to answer on something like this. But I keep coming back to it. Why? And more importantly, what kind of people will be living on this planet when my children are grown? Will the Heroic Values even exist anymore? Will the World’s heroes in actuality be the World’s criminals? We’re almost there in some areas.<br /><br /><div style="text-align: center; font-style: italic;">“A hero is someone who has given his or her life to something bigger than oneself. “<br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-weight: bold;">Joseph Campbell</span><br /><br /></div>I think that this quote probably sums up a big problem for me with today’s famous heroes. They aren’t heroes, for the most part, because they are only interested in what they can get for themselves. And that’s NOT a hero. That is usually the villain. Heroes aren’t about grabbing as much as they can for themselves. That’s not the way Heroic Values are expressed. Heroes are those that would willingly give all they had for someone else. A hero is one that makes things better, simply by being there.<br /><br /><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-style: italic;">“A hero is an ordinary individual who finds the strength to persevere and endure in spite of overwhelming obstacles.”</span><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-weight: bold;">Christopher Reeve</span><br /></div><br />We have a responsibility to our children to teach them. Sorry…but yes, that is a PARENT’S responsibility. It’s not a school teacher’s job, it’s not a church’s job, it’s the parent’s job. Sadly, if you look around at our world today, it seems that most parents are failing in this job. This is leaving children to decide for themselves what values to have. Or worse, they get them from TV.<br /><br />I’m a parent, so I can bitch. :-) I don’t want my sons to grow up in a world where the biggest heroes are gold toothed rap singers or athletes that think they are above the law or even simple rich people that never seem to have enough. I want them to know the stories of courage and honor. Where the heroes quest, fight (sometimes they lose), and yet they persevere in the end. They will know the myths, the legends, and the amazing people that changed the world before them. And when they are grown, they will KNOW that they have the ability to change the world too.<br /><br /><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-style: italic;">“In the name of the best within you, do not sacrifice this world to those who are its worst. In the name of the values that keep you alive, do not let your vision of man be distorted by the ugly, the cowardly, the mindless in those who have never achieved his title. Do not lose your knowledge that man's proper estate is an upright posture, an intransigent mind and a step that travels unlimited roads. Do not let your fire go out, spark by irreplaceable spark, in the hopeless swamps of the approximate, the not-quite, the not-yet, the not-at-all. Do not let the hero in your soul perish, in lonely frustration for the life you deserved, but have never been able to reach. Check your road and the nature of your battle. The world you desired can be won, it exists, it is real, it is possible, it's yours.”</span><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-weight: bold;">Ayn Rand</span><br /></div><br />Most importantly, I want you to know those stories. That’s how our children are going to learn of them. More than that, I want you to know them so that you might believe that YOU can change the world right now. Because you can. Sure, things are hard, but so what? Sure, you’re just one person, but so what? Want some examples of amazing people that changed the world by themselves? Gandhi, Mother Theresa, Martin Luther King, Rosa Parks. Now, I know what you’re thinking…they were special people and you’re nothing like them. Guess what? You’re wrong. You have the exact same things inside of you. You just have to reach down and get in touch with it.<br /><br />So come on…let’s make a better world together. For ourselves and for our kids.<br /><br /><div style="text-align: center; font-style: italic;">“The thing about a hero, is even when it doesn't look like there's a light at the end of the tunnel, he's going to keep digging, he's going to keep trying to do right and make up for what's gone before, just because that's who he is.”<br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-weight: bold;">Joss Whedon</span><br /></div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1837935187662786017.post-71440945956805507072009-06-22T12:23:00.000-04:002009-06-22T12:26:29.425-04:00Birds don’t pack worms to migrate<div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-style: italic;">“All they gave me was this ticket to heaven</span><br /><span style="font-style: italic;">But that ticket to heaven, said to lie in the bed that you make</span><br /><span style="font-style: italic;">Now I'm restless and I'm running from everything, I'm running from everything,</span><br /><span style="font-style: italic;">I'm afraid it's a little too late”</span><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-weight: bold;">- 3 Doors Down</span><br /></div><br />I’ve often talked about having faith here. Faith in yourself. Faith in your Higher Power, or God, or whatever you call it. Faith in doing the right thing, regardless of what happens.<br /><br />So, I’m going to talk a bit about faith again today. :-)<br /><br />See, to me, faith is SUCH an integral and important part of life that I can’t imagine going through a single day without it. Even on my worst days (and I’ve had PLENTY of those), I find that I still have that little nugget of faith in my heart that says <span style="font-style: italic;">“Hold on…we’ll get through this too.”</span><br /><br />Everywhere I look I see amazing examples of faith in action. See, that’s the key. Faith in ACTION. Sure, it’s great to have tons of faith in your heart, but if you don’t ever act on that faith or use it, then really, what good is it to you? But every day we see people that take their faith in hand and do the most amazing things with it. We have seen people that climbed the highest mountains, gone from less than broke to worldwide fame and fortune, I see people all the time that have the faith to keep trying to make it in a band in spite of everything that happens.<br /><br />These are the stories that motivate us all. You just can’t help but get that good feeling in your heart when you read about them. I was blessed enough to be given a copy of Chris Gardner’s new book recently. You remember him; they made a movie about a single year of his life. It’s called the Pursuit of Happyness. That was just a single year in this amazing man’s life. He’s very open about his experiences, including an abusive alcoholic stepfather, his year of “working homelessness” as he puts it, and many other challenges that he overcame. Throughout this awesome book (<span style="font-style: italic;">Start Where You Are</span>) he constantly reminds us that it was faith in himself and sometimes simply faith that things WOULD get better that helped him make it through the hardest of times.<br /><br />Faith is one of the most powerful motivators in our lives. Faith is what allows us to reach for our dreams. Faith in ourselves and in something better than what you have right now.<br /><br />But I think the most important aspect of faith is that it allows us to see beyond our current circumstances. It allows us to believe that whatever we are going through right now is only temporary. Too often we get into the mindset that things are the way they are and they will always be that way. Well my friends, let me tell you this.<br /><br /><div style="text-align: center;">THAT’S A CROCK OF SHIT!<br /></div><br />Nothing is ever forever! Change is what life is all about. Fear holds most of us back from simply trying something new, making something better, doing something different. Fear is what keeps us all stuck. Faith frees us from that fear. Believe and KNOW in your heart that everything can be different. You just need the faith to give it a shot.<br /><br />The best example of faith, for me, came from one of my very best friends. See, he had just gotten married and was planning on moving to Orlando. He didn’t have a job, yet, or a place to live, yet. But he believed that Orlando was where he was supposed to be for right now. So he and his new bride made the plans to move.<br /><br />He told me how his parents reacted and I laughed with him. They kept asking how he could possibly move without a place to live or a job for when they got there. How can you do this?<br /><br />I simply LOVE his response…he said,<br /><br /><span style="font-style: italic;">“Do birds pack worms before they migrate, or do they have faith that wherever they land, there will be worms there for them?”</span><br /><br />Have faith my friends. You really CAN do anything as long as you believe. :-)Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1837935187662786017.post-35716448885948682202009-06-11T14:27:00.000-04:002009-06-11T14:29:17.134-04:00Step 12 – Uncovering Your Light<div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-style: italic;">“Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to other addicts, and to practice these principles in all our affairs”</span><br /></div><br /><br />Step 12 is the step of fellowship. It’s the step where we take everything that we’ve experienced and everything that we’ve learned and we share it with other people. It is often said that we can only help others with things that we have experienced ourselves. This step is where we do just that.<br /><br />If you look back at your own progress you will see the amazing journey that you’ve taken, in just this one area that you’ve decided to focus on, and the incredible progress that you’ve made. When we started this journey, more than likely, you were afraid, worried, and maybe even a little disbelieving. And yet, now, you can see what you’ve managed to accomplish. You can feel the new lifestyle that you’re working to create.<br /><br />The best thing to do right now, the best encouragement you can give to yourself, is to share your journey with someone else. Notice, I’m NOT telling you to give them advice or tell them what to do, just simply share what you’ve gone through and the journey you took to change. That will be enough to help them, if they want it.<br /><br />The biggest thing right now is to not let that wicked feeling of shame to enter into your thoughts. True, you may have been in a rough place when you finally started to work but that’s OK. It is NOTHING to be ashamed about. Remember, that everyone has had rough times, and keep focused on the fact that you had the faith and courage to DO something about it. That’s more than most people can lay claim to.<br /><br /><span style="font-style: italic;">“The selfless service of this work is the very principle of Step Twelve. We received our recovery from the God of our understanding, so we now make ourselves available as His tool to share recovery with those who seek it. Most of us learn in time that we can only carry our message to someone who is asking for help. Sometimes the only message necessary to make the suffering addict reach out is the power of example. An addict may be suffering but unwilling to ask for help. We can make ourselves available to these people, so that when they ask, someone will be there.</span><br /><br /><span style="font-style: italic;">Learning the art of helping others when it is appropriate is a benefit of the N.A. Program. Remarkably, the Twelve Steps guide us from humiliation and despair to a state wherein we may act as instruments of our Higher Power. We are given the ability to help a fellow addict when no one else can. We see it happening among us every day. This miraculous turnabout is evidence of spiritual awakening. We share from our own personal experience what it has been like for us. The temptation to give advice is great, but when we do so we lose the respect of newcomers. This clouds our message. A simple, honest message of recovery from addiction rings true.”</span><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">- Narcotics Anonymous Basic Text</span><br /><br />I hope that one of the things that you learn from your journey through the 12 Steps is that you are NEVER alone. No one in this life is ever completely alone. All it takes is for you to lift your head and look around. Others may be going through the same thing right at this moment, or they may have survived what you are going through, and if you don’t see anyone nearby, there is ALWAYS your Higher Power that is looking out for you.<br /><br />Keep this step at the forefront of your thoughts. It reminds us to practice the steps in EVERY aspect of our lives and to ALWAYS help when it is right to do so. I believe that this is a true blessing of the 12 Steps. The willingness, confidence, and ability to help another person, no matter what their situation might be.<br /><br />Step 12 is that daily encouragement that we all sometimes need. We are reminded that BECAUSE of the spiritual awakening we have experienced in going through our own steps, we are able to take and share that same experience with others in desperate need of it. Indeed, BECAUSE of our spiritual awakening, we will be better each and every day and apply the lessons learned from our journeys.<br /><br />Today I’m going to leave you with two of my absolute favorite quotes. :-) The first I’ve used before because it is simply awesome and gives me chills every time I read it. The second is from the movie Holy Man with Eddie Murphy. It is his goodbye blessing to a man who made his own spiritual journey and came to see the world with new eyes.<br /><br />May your own eyes come to see the real world and your place in this beautiful story.<br /><br /><span style="font-style: italic;">“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”</span><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">- Marianne Williamson</span><br /><br />And always remember this one…my own blessing for you each and every day.<br /><br /><span style="font-style: italic;">“Your good is better and your better is blest.”</span><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">- G – Holy Man</span>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1837935187662786017.post-71119679333803105822009-06-08T13:54:00.000-04:002009-06-08T13:55:54.148-04:00Step 11 – The Buddha Step<div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-style: italic;">“Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God as we understood God, praying only for knowledge of God's will for us and the power to carry that out”</span><br /></div><br />Ohh…prayer AND meditation. Everyone’s favorite things to do, right? :-)<br /><br />So…this step is all about getting in touch with your inner monk. Shaving your head is optional, as is the vow of celibacy. Ha Ha. Really, it’s OK to keep reading this one. I’m not going to hold you to anything.<br /><br />What is this step all about? It’s rather simple really. It’s about getting in closer contact with your own spirituality. That inner core of who you are that is just waiting to help you make the next right choice. No matter what you call your Higher Power, now is the time to start working on THAT relationship.<br /><br />You’ve got the tools now to work on any part of your life and make it better. You’ve got the tools to make yourself better in so many different ways. You’ve opened up to the ability of self evaluation and true self improvement.<br /><br />This step is about more than just yourself. It’s about opening yourself up to the possibility that your Higher Power has a plan for you. That it wants the absolute best for you and is determined and able to assist you in reaching that goal.<br /><br /><span style="font-style: italic;">“When we first come to the Program, we usually express a lot of things which seem to be important wants and needs. As we grow spiritually and find out about a Power greater than ourselves, we begin to realize that as long as our spiritual needs are truly met, our living problems are reduced to a point of comfort. When we forget where our real strength lies, we quickly become subject to the same patterns of thinking and action that got us to the Program in the first place. We eventually redefine our beliefs and understanding to the point where we see that our greatest need is for knowledge of God's will for us and the strength to carry that out. We are able to set aside some of our personal preference, if necessary, to do this because we learn that God's will consists of the very things we care most about. God's will for us becomes our own true will for ourselves. This happens in an intuitive manner which cannot be adequately explained in words.</span><br /><br /><span style="font-style: italic;">We become willing to let other people be what they are without having to pass judgment on them. The urgency to take care of things isn't there anymore. We couldn't comprehend acceptance in the beginning-now we can.”</span><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">- Narcotics Anonymous Basic Text,</span><br /><br />But…I don’t know the right way to pray! Yes, I’ve actually heard that as an excuse to NOT talk to God. The funny thing is, I’m pretty certain that He doesn’t care about the “right way”; He just wants to talk to you.<br /><br />Have you ever sat for hours with a close friend and talked about everything that’s going on in your life right now? The things you’re happy about, your fears, concerns, dreams, everything? See, I think that’s how you should talk to God. And why not? Think you’re too insignificant for that kind of conversation? Hopefully you’re beginning to think a little different now, after the work you’ve been doing.<br /><br /><span style="font-style: italic;">“If we have had little or no experience with prayer, we should probably begin in a simple fashion. That means putting aside perfectionistic concerns about praying "the right way." We should pray simply and forthrightly to God as a loving Father, not worrying about what we should and should not say.</span><br /><br /><span style="font-style: italic;">Over time, as we become comfortable with God, we will talk with Him as with a trusted friend. He will be the Person with whom we can conduct our daily inventories of grief and confession issues. And we will begin to sense His answers to our prayers...”</span><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">- Serenity, A Companion for Twelve Step Recovery</span><br /><br />The most important part of this step is that you realize that you are fundamentally “good”. You are. Regardless of anything that might have happened before. If you don’t take joy and pleasure in torturing cute little puppy dogs, then you’re fundamentally good. :-)<br /><br />This step is about getting you in conscious contact with that part of you that KNOWS that and bringing that to the surface. The great thing is…it’s all already inside you. Probably buried under a mountain of shit, but that’s what the steps are for. The steps are your shovel to get at that buried treasure. Your awareness of your Higher Power is another tool, another set of hands to help you shovel. So take some time today and say “Hi!” you never know what you might find.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1837935187662786017.post-20130954312576820222009-06-05T14:09:00.000-04:002009-06-05T14:11:04.669-04:00Step 10 – Keep on Keepin’ on<div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-style: italic;">“Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it”</span><br /></div><br />OK…I know that it’s been a while, but hopefully, you’ve been putting the first nine steps to work in your life and seen something of a difference. Maybe you simply feel better about where your life is going and how you’re living every day. Maybe you’ve been able to find a way to fix a broken relationship that you never thought could be fixed. Maybe you can see now how your old behaviors held you back and are making progress every day to move toward better behaviors.<br /><br />Or…maybe not. :-)<br /><br />Regardless of where you’re at right now, step 10 is something for everyone to keep in mind. It’s not just restricted to people working the 12 steps, but rather, it’s a lesson that all people everywhere can benefit from. Simply put, keep doing the right thing.<br /><br /><span style="font-style: italic;">“This thought brings us to Step Ten, which suggests we continue to take personal inventory and continue to set right any new mistakes as we go along. We vigorously commenced this way of living as we cleaned up the past. We have entered the world of the Spirit. Our next function is to grow in understanding and effectiveness. This is not an overnight matter. It should continue for our lifetime. Continue to watch for selfishness, dishonesty, resentment, and fear. When these crop up, we ask God at once to remove them. We discuss them with someone immediately and make amends quickly if we have harmed anyone. Then we resolutely turn our thoughts to someone we can help. Love and tolerance of others is our code.”</span><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">-A.A. Big Book</span><br /><br />Life isn’t a single instance or moment or “Aha!” and then we’re done. It is a journey, a walk, and daily task in which we can learn to do better than the day before. In order to be and become the absolute best person that you can, you must pursue being better every day. That’s not to say that you are working hard at it every day, but rather, that you are aware of yourself and your own behaviors all the time. Most important to the self awareness mindset is that you watch for those “bad” behaviors and change them as them appear and also to make amends for mistakes and hurts immediately.<br /><br /><span style="font-style: italic;">“The emphasis on inventory is heavy only because a great many of us have never really acquired the habit of accurate self-appraisal. Once this healthy practice has been groomed, it will be so interesting and profitable that the time it takes won't be missed. For these minutes and sometimes hours spent in self-examination are bound to make all the other hours of our day better and happier. And at length our inventories become a regular part of everyday living, rather than unusual or set apart.”</span><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">- Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions</span><br /><br />I like the fact that the 12 steps encourage us all to take time from each day to evaluate how well we did. It’s like getting a progress report every day on us. Often, every day brings struggles, challenges, good times, bad times, and times when I simply feel “blah”. By taking a bit of time at the end of my day, I’m able to put it all into perspective and “grade” my actions, thoughts, and feelings. I can resolve to do better, think nicer, and apologize when I’m wrong or reacted in a hurtful manner. I’ll be the first to admit that some days are better than others. :-)<br /><br /><span style="font-style: italic;">“The Tenth Step can be a pressure relief valve. We work this step while the day's ups and downs are still fresh in our minds. We list what we have done and try not to rationalize our actions. This may be done in writing at the end of the day. The first thing we do is stop! Then we take the time to allow ourselves the privilege of thinking. We examine our actions, our reactions, and our motives. We often find that we've been "doing" better than we've been "feeling". This allows us to find out where we have gone wrong and admit fault before things get any worse. We need to avoid rationalizing. We promptly admit our faults, not explain them.</span><br /><br /><span style="font-style: italic;">We work this step continuously. This is a prevention, and the more we do it, the less we will need the corrective part of this step. This is really a great tool. It gives us a way of avoiding grief before we bring it on ourselves. We monitor our feelings, our emotions, our fantasies, and our actions. By constantly looking at these things we may be able to avoid repeating the actions that make us feel bad.”</span><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">- Narcotics Anonymous Basic Text</span><br /><br />This is my life and it’s the only one that I get. There are no retakes, no do-overs, and no restarts. I want to make the most of every moment that I’m granted and be a blessing, not a burden, to everyone brought into my life. I know that I’m not perfect, and really that’s a good thing. Step 10 helps me to keep daily perspective of myself, but it also helps me in dealing with everyone else. I can listen and understand, empathize and console, dance and sing with everyone that I meet.<br /><br />So, keep on keepin’ on and know that whatever grade you get today, tomorrow is another day. :-)Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1837935187662786017.post-81722974222031844202009-05-19T14:11:00.004-04:002009-05-19T14:20:45.005-04:00Do You See What I See?Take a look at this picture and think about what you see here.<br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhhbL3-85HSxuYygIgX82CmsLqSWnhRIepbNPsfVo2hZTD_cOZij1D4S5MO_ZUwVNAPIssNhHNr24IUeXzkoiVEThwQudlvb910mA6dD6ZtGyNOAL1aN74w7fHyylT5RSL6bQuw_lyVpcdx/s1600-h/Painting.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 241px; height: 320px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhhbL3-85HSxuYygIgX82CmsLqSWnhRIepbNPsfVo2hZTD_cOZij1D4S5MO_ZUwVNAPIssNhHNr24IUeXzkoiVEThwQudlvb910mA6dD6ZtGyNOAL1aN74w7fHyylT5RSL6bQuw_lyVpcdx/s320/Painting.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5337600626130376242" border="0" /></a><br /><br />I’m not going to ask you whether or not you like the painting. See, I don’t really care about that. :-) The point is that everyone will see something different. What we see when we look at something is highly determined by our own internal state and perceptions. That’s what we’re going to talk about today. Perceptions.<br /><br /><span style="font-style: italic;">“We don't see things as they are; we see things as we are”</span><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">-Anais Nin</span><br /><br />Everyone likes to talk about their “point of view” and they all want you to get theirs. That seems to me, like asking a dog to look at the world the way a cat does. I haven’t had your experiences and I certainly wouldn’t react to them the same way you have. My perception of reality will ALWAYS be different than yours. That’s just the way we are made. We are all unique and original in and of ourselves.<br /><br />And I’ll even grant you that you see the world differently than I do. That’s one of the most beautiful things about people. We can both sit down and watch a sunset together and come away with completely different and relevant experiences. What might be moving to me, you may consider mundane. And really…that’s OK.<br /><br />Lord knows that you all DON’T want a bunch of clones of me walking around. :-)<br /><br /><span style="font-style: italic;">“Pain is a relatively objective, physical phenomenon; suffering is our psychological resistance to what happens. Events may create physical pain, but they do not in themselves create suffering. Resistance creates suffering. Stress happens when your mind resists what is...The only problem in your life is your mind's resistance to life as it unfolds.”</span><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">-Dan Millman</span><br /><br /><span style="font-style: italic;">“Pain is inevitable. Suffering is optional.”</span><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">-Dalai Lama</span><br /><br />What does this mean for us as people? And more specifically, what does it mean to us who are trying to become more than we currently are?<br /><br />It means that we have the natural ability to CHOOSE how we see our world and lives. We have the ability to choose how we respond to anything that happens in our lives. I like the way that Stephen Covey puts it when he says that we are “response-able” creatures. He means that in every situation and with every stimulus, we have the ability to choose our response. Sometimes it’s a response that happens so quick that only our subconscious is aware of it, but it’s still a chosen response. The trick is making that time between stimulus and response as large as possible to give you enough time to choose the best response.<br /><br />It means that when something bad happens in our lives, we can CHOOSE to respond differently. To think differently. To feel differently. To live differently.<br /><br /><span style="font-style: italic;">“We cannot choose our external circumstances, but we can always choose how we respond to them.”</span><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">-Epictetus</span><br /><br /><span style="font-style: italic;">“What you see and hear depends a good deal on where you are standing; it also depends on what sort of person you are”</span><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">-C. S. Lewis</span><br /><br />Look at this picture now and think about what you see.<br /><br /><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_tphgMbBwu5I/ShL2oKS_zBI/AAAAAAAAACE/6vN3L-aIuJA/s1600-h/young+old+woman.gif"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 259px; height: 320px;" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_tphgMbBwu5I/ShL2oKS_zBI/AAAAAAAAACE/6vN3L-aIuJA/s320/young+old+woman.gif" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5337599678206692370" border="0" /></a><br /><br /><br />This is a standard perception test picture. It is designed to show you a basic biasness in our own personal perceptions. See…there are two women in this picture. Can you see them? One is a very young woman and the other is a very old woman. Which did you see first?<br /><br />It’s always a good idea to challenge your own perceptions from time to time. All too often we simply accept the way we see things as though it was perfect truth. Lives change, the world changes, people change, and the worst thing we can do is to hold onto our old perceptions of life. Everything in life grows, everything changes. We need to make certain that the way we see the world changes too. Oh, don’t worry; you won’t have your 3 year old perceptions your whole life. Although, I do know people that just might still have them. :-) But rather than letting your perceptions and life filters change in response to something external, YOU change them. That’s why we need to challenge our own perceptions, so that WE can be the ones to change them. So that we are the ones changing our own lives and not letting someone else have that control and power.<br /><br />There is no right or wrong when it comes to how you view the world. No one else can judge your view point, except you. If you find something that isn’t working for you anymore, then by all means, change it, fix it, or throw it out.<br /><br />And remember…if you ever get stuck on how you want to view the world…start with a smile and a laugh and go from there. :-)<br /><br /><span style="font-style: italic;">“You can complain because roses have thorns, or you can rejoice because thorns have roses”</span><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">-Ziggy</span><br /><br /><br /><br />P.S. – The first picture is my own painting. Hope you liked it. :-)Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1